


Anybody Listening?

by Morgana_avalon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 05:40:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 29,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18359738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morgana_avalon/pseuds/Morgana_avalon
Summary: Gabriel reaches out to Sam who's suffering from nightmares while dealing with his own memories regarding Asmodeus.





	Anybody Listening?

Anybody listening?

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t ignore Sam’s suffering. Gabriel had retreated to the bedroom the Winchesters had assigned him, relieved to finally have some privacy. He had been through a lot lately and, if honest, he hadn’t even begun processing everything that had happened to him. Each time he momentarily closed his eyes, Asmodeus’ ugly visage would grin back at him, taunting him – hurting him. Gabriel drew in a deep breath and tried to banish those memories, but he knew his reprieve wouldn’t last long, not until he faced his fears and moved past them.

Distressed yelps cut through the silence of his room. Sam, who occupied the room next-door, was having one hell of nightmare. Literally. Sam was pleading with Lucifer to stop tormenting him. Wisps of words, thoughts and memories entered Gabriel’s mind and he allowed it because he was desperate for a distraction; anything to take his mind off his own nemesis. 

He briefly debated what to do. He could stay in his room, ignore Sam’s distress or act upon it. Both options scared him. These days, he was used to feeling scared, which horrified the still rationally thinking part of him. He was an archangel, and although he had fought his share of battles, none of those had hurt him the way Asmodeus’ torture had. 

He knew what Sam was feeling, what the other man was going through because he had lived through it himself, and he simply couldn’t turn his back on him. Even though the mere thought of offering Sam his help scared him witless: for what would become of him once he actively showed he cared? He had learned a long time ago that being vulnerable led to getting hurt. His brothers had seen to that. 

But this wasn’t about his brothers. This wasn’t about Lucifer, Michael or even Raphael mocking him for what they had called his worst character flaw. Caring too much had always been his downfall. It was the very reason why he had decided to flee Heaven and make Earth his home. He’d had to get away from it all; from the intrigue, the manipulation. He had never wanted to choose sides. He had just wanted his family with him. He had wanted harmony. His brothers hadn’t cared though.

And what he found he couldn’t do right now was pretend he didn’t care about Sam being in distress. He could turn his back on him no more. He drew in another deep breath, called himself a fool for what he was about to do, but did it anyway. He walked over to the doorway, opened the door, and stepped into the corridor after a quick check that it was indeed empty, as he didn’t fancy walking into Dean. 

Muffled sounds made it into the corridor and Gabriel realized the nightmare was gaining in strength. It had truly ensnared Sam and lured him back into that dark cage of remembered pain. Sam’s torment drew him close like a moth to the flame. His hand shook when he rested it on the doorknob, knowing full well that his life would change once he stepped into that room. It wasn’t a choice he easily made, but when he turned the doorknob and took that one step forward, he did so very much aware that he was about to acknowledge a part of himself that he had denied for a very long time.

Admitting he cared made him nervous and jittery, and unsure if his support was even wanted, but he persevered and moved closer to the bed. Sam was wrestling the comforter. His face was contorted in pain and his hands moved in front of his face in an attempt to protect himself from his attacker. 

“Please, stop… no more!”

Sam’s soft pleading broke his heart. Gabriel recalled a time, not so long ago, that he had begged Asmodeus in a very similar way to stop hurting him. But no, he wasn’t going to allow those memories to drag him down into despair. He was here to help Sam, to support him and chase away the nightmare. 

“Don’t… stop it! I can’t…”

Sam’s begging urged him on, as did the sleeping man’s frantic movements. Sam wrestled the comforter, tried to kick it away, but seemed to be losing the battle as the fabric merely constricted his movement further. A moment later, Sam stilled and his breathing grew shallow. 

“Damn you, Lucifer,” Gabriel spat and cursed his brother for taking out his wrath on innocents like Sam Winchester, who had done nothing to warrant such torment. But he knew Lucifer had delighted in torturing Sam and Gabriel couldn’t help but feel guilty in his brother’s stead. 

Gabriel carefully seated himself next to Sam and closed his eyes, calling upon his grace, which was still weak to begin with. He should be resting and giving himself a chance to truly recover from his own ordeal, but he couldn’t walk away now. His right hand came to rest upon Sam’s brow, instantly noticing the hot and clammy feel of his skin. “Hush now,” he whispered, “you’re safe.” 

His fingertips gently moved across Sam’s forehead and a smile stole onto his face. “You’re safe,” he repeated and before he fully realized what he was doing, he dove into Sam’s mind. He recoiled momentarily, and wanted to flee that ruined dreamscape in which Lucifer and Sam were back in the cage. Painfully reminded of the fact that it was his brother who had hurt Sam this deeply, he took to cautiously repairing the damage Lucifer had done. Death had tried to contain that damage by building a wall, but he had failed. Death had been destined to fail, Gabriel realized, as only another archangel could undo the damage Lucifer had done.

And he wasn’t going to stop before he had succeeded in wiping all those horrendous memories from Sam’s mind. It was slow and precise work, and it drained him further, but Gabriel wasn’t giving up. He was going to do this right; he should have done this a long time ago, when it had become apparent how much damage Lucifer had done, but no, he had been intent on playing his tricks on both brothers. He should have reached out and offered his help instead. This time he wasn’t going to take the coward’s way out. This time he would do the right thing.

Gabriel slumped forward and nearly collapsed once he finished with the complex eradication of Lucifer’s festering manipulations. He had suspected his brother had gone to great lengths to convince Sam to say yes, to allow him in, but Gabriel hadn’t realized just how bad that torment had been. He placed a hand against the headboard for support when vertigo unexpectedly hit him. Damn, he was weaker than he had thought. If something so minor as fixing Sam’s mind drained him to such an extent, he really was in a bad way.

He had to get his act together and leave the room before Sam woke up, because he wasn’t looking forward to explaining what the hell he was doing here. But he was dizzy and he felt so damn weak! Damn Asmodeus for doing this to him!

“Gabriel?”

Ah fuck, no. Of course Sam had to wake up! Gabriel somehow managed to compose himself, raised his head, and tried to make light of the situation, grinning like the trickster of old and about to brush it off with banter when Sam’s stunned expression registered with him. 

Sam stared at Gabriel in utter surprise. What the hell was the archangel doing in his room? Not to mention sitting on the bed and hovering over him? Gabriel looked distinctively unwell. It was odd to see the archangel in such a surprisingly human condition. A fine layer of sweat had formed on Gabriel’s forehead and the eyes, which normally shone with mischief, now seemed feverish to him. Gabriel was supporting himself, obviously fighting hard not to collapse and Sam noticed the archangel’s sped up breathing. “You’re not about to pass out on me, are you?” The moment Sam said it, he realized it could very well happen. 

“Nope, sorry to disappoint you.” Gabriel tried for his normal wit, but for some reason he couldn’t pull it off. He was tired; so fucking tired. 

“You look like shit… Are you sure you’re fine?” Sam elbowed himself into an upright position and studied Gabriel. The archangel looked bad. Gabriel might be acting tough and denying he was about to collapse, but Sam read between the lines. He knew Gabriel cared, probably cared so much it had gotten him in trouble in the past and was hiding behind the front of the trickster that had served him so well in the past. The thing was, the gimmick wasn’t working any longer. Gabriel wasn’t the trickster any more. “Come on, lie down before you collapse.” 

All kinds of alarms went off inside Gabriel’s mind. No, that was definitely a bad idea. Getting close to someone was a bad idea period. He had spent so many millennia running away, trying not to feel anything and now it was about to happen again. It was time for some damage control. “Sam…” But his heart wasn’t in it.

“Stop it, Gabriel. Don’t lie and don’t play any tricks on me. I don’t know why you’re here, but…” Hold on, hadn’t he had the mother of all nightmares just a moment ago? He had been back in the cage with Lucifer and… Sam blinked, remembering all the pain he had been in and then… Then this warm, golden light had flooded his being. It had cocooned and soothed him. It had shined so brightly that it had driven the darkness away. The pain had faded along with the memories. “What did you do?” Sam had a hard time even recalling what had happened in that cage.

Gabriel shrugged and barely managed to keep upright. The mattress beneath him was soft and called to him, urging him to rest. “Hardly anything.”

“And that’s why you’re so fucking drained? Because you hardly did a thing? Why don’t I believe that?” Realizing Gabriel wasn’t going to make this easy on him, Sam decided to take action. He curled an arm around the archangel’s shoulder and pulled him down onto the bed beside him. “At least lie down and rest.” For a second it looked as if Gabriel was going to protest, but then exhaustion got the better of him. 

He reluctantly stretched next to Sam and a deep, pained groan escaped his lips. “Sam, what are you doing?” His instincts were on full alert. Gabriel couldn’t recall a time someone had been this concerned about him. “It’s nothing.”

“You’re exhausted, don’t deny it,” Sam told him decisively. “There’s no shame in admitting you need rest.” Gabriel might have presented him with a riddle when they had first met, and even afterwards when he had played his tricks on them, but lately, the archangel had shown his true colors; Gabriel cared. That realization had made so many things right again in his world.

“Why are you grinning like mad?” Gabriel had turned his head slightly and caught what he considered a silly mad, grin on Sam’s face. What could possibly be that funny, considering their current situation?

Sam moved onto his side so he could maintain eye contact. He briefly considered the wisdom of making himself so vulnerable where Gabriel was concerned, but decided to go ahead nonetheless because he had faith in the archangel. “When I was little, I thought angels were...” Well, how to explain this? “The good guys, like, angels were guardian angels, who watched over us. I thought the world of them, admired them, maybe even worshiped them. When I first found out about Cas, Uriel, Raphael, and the rest, I realized they were dicks and it hurt.”

Gabriel stopped himself from commenting, hoping this was leading somewhere. He wasn’t sure he couldn’t stay awake long enough to find out though. 

Sam smiled a little at seeing Gabriel’s clueless expression. “Cas turned out to be one of the good guys after all. At first, he acted like a dick too. Then you showed up, and when you revealed yourself as the archangel Gabriel, I…” Damn, admitting this was hard! “You destroyed any remaining belief I had in the goodness of angels. You were so fucking concerned about playing tricks on us, instead of helping us fight Lucifer!”

“Sam, this isn’t helping.” Gabriel had a hard time fully understanding the things Sam was telling him. “Too tired.”

Sam nodded in understanding. “I just want you to know that I have faith in you, Gabriel. You restored my faith.”

Faith in him? What kind of madness was this? They would have to discuss this a different time though, as his eyes were closing. Gabriel felt himself slip away into that state humans called sleep, and which had been a stranger to him for eons. Now that he was low on grace though, he needed to sleep. So his eyes closed, his breathing evened out, and he finally got a chance to rest. 

Sam studied Gabriel and noticed the shivers running through the archangel’s body. He reached for the comforter and covered them with it. Growing aware that he was being watched, he looked over at the doorway and wasn’t surprised to see Dean standing there. Dean’s expression was odd and Sam had a good idea what was going on in his brother’s mind. They had both been wrong about Gabriel. 

“What’s he doing here?” Dean nodded towards the sleeping archangel. The last time he had seen Gabriel was when showing him his room. 

“I had a nightmare,” Sam admitted in a soft voice. “A bad one about the cage. I was struggling and then it stopped.” Dean would doubtlessly figure it out.

“He did that?” Dean wasn’t sure what to think about that. He had hoped Gabriel would prove to be a worthy ally, but in the back of his mind, he kept remembering all those times Gabriel had tricked them. 

“Yeah, he did,” Sam whispered, not wanting to wake up Gabriel. He felt protective of the archangel. It had taken courage for Gabriel to reach out to him. Sam carefully wrapped an arm around Gabriel and moved him a little closer, ignoring the chuckle the move drew from Dean. “He deserves it,” Sam commented and looked at his brother. “He’s been through hell with Asmodeus.”

“Sure,” Dean commented with a grin on his face. If Sammy liked Gabriel that was fine with him. It wasn’t like he was immune to angelic charm either. “I’ll see you in the morning.” Dean gently closed the door, careful not to make any unnecessary noise and walked down the corridor. 

Dean’s mellow reaction didn’t surprise Sam. Anyone who took care of his baby brother was a friend in Dean’s book, and now Gabriel had joined a few short and exclusive list of people whom Dean would go to great lengths for. Sam became aware of Gabriel’s body heat and the way it was luring him back into sleep. He didn’t fight it and closed his eyes, enjoying the fact that he wasn’t alone anymore.

TBC

Part 2

Gabriel startled awake. In his dreams he had been back at Asmodeus’ lair and once more trapped in his prison cell. He hated those damn dreams and whished his grace was fully recharged, but that was merely wishful thinking. It would take him a lot longer than a few hours to get his grace levels back up. Come to think of it, why the hell were they down again? 

“Gabriel?” Sam placed his book aside and leaned in closer. He had woken up first thing in the morning and hadn’t had the heart to wake Gabriel, who was in desperate need of sleep. After a quick shower and fetching some much needed coffee, he had relocated to the chair next to the bed from where he kept a close eye on the sleeping archangel. “How are you doing?” At the moment, Gabriel looked awfully confused, maybe even a tad shy, which didn’t seem to fit the normally cheeky archangel. But something between them had changed last night, Sam was very much aware of that. 

“Rats, what am I doing here?” Gabriel’s instincts told him to pretend ignorance. Maybe he could blame his actions on being exhausted and not thinking straight, but he had the feeling Sam wouldn’t allow him to get off so easy. 

“Sorry about barging in last night, must have been sleepwalking.” Gabriel managed to sit up, leaned his back against headboard – for only one moment, he told himself – but then had to admit he was still bone tired and couldn’t bother to push himself to his feet yet. “I’ll be good to go in a minute. I’ll be out of your hair then, although, your hair is all over the place and –“

“Stop it,” said Sam while giving Gabriel an admonishing look. “Stop the act.” 

Fuck, yeah, Sam knew the truth about him now, Gabriel realized that, but he wasn’t ready yet to admit defeat. He rested the back of his head against the wall, closed his eyes, and concentrated on his breathing. It wouldn’t do to pass out in Sam Winchester’s bed of all places! He was tempted to question Sam about the supposed act he was putting on, but decided against it, as he had the distinct feeling he would be setting himself up for even more problems. “Your timing is still off. Head hurts.” Time for a different approach. Gabriel partly opened his right eye and squinted at Sam. “Have pity on me?”

“You do look tired,” Sam admitted, his worry concerning the archangel once more growing. “Maybe you need to eat and get some fluids in you.”

“You’re a mother hen, you know that?” Gabriel couldn’t help himself and smiled. No one had ever mothered him before. Neither his father, nor his brothers had had the patience to put up with his antics. He had always wondered what it would be like; having someone looking after him in that way. It seemed he might find out after all. 

Sam shrugged. “I’ve been accused of that before and can live with that. I’m going to get you some breakfast. Don’t move. Stay! And don’t you dare vanish on me, you hear me?”

“Yes, sir,” Gabriel said and barely contained the urge to salute. He watched Sam leave the room, but not before the other man gave him one more look from over his shoulder as if to make sure he was obeying. Once Sam had left the room, Gabriel closed his eyes again and gently shook his head. “What did I get myself into this time? Why couldn’t I simply stay in my room and ignore him?” He had gotten himself into this mess, so he had to get himself out again. It was the story of his life.

“Here, this might help.” Sam placed the tray on the nightstand and sat down on the side of the bed. “You might be an archangel, but you don’t look the part right now.” He made sure to smile in order to take out any sting his words might provoke. “I made you some chamomile tea, it’s said to have great healing qualities.” Sam pointedly ignored the evilly raised eyebrow Gabriel gave him. “Behave,” he said and chuckled while handing the archangel the mug. 

“Don’t know how to do that, Sammy. Never tried to kick my bad habits before.” But a voice deep down said that it might be worth his while if he did that for Sam. The look the other man gave him spoke of respect, sympathy, and maybe even more, but he wasn’t going there. He sipped and pretended to be disgusted. “Sammy, really?” He had a good time angling Sam though. However, what was that underlying sensation he got whenever Sam looked at him in that particular way?

“Yes, really. Now, food. Dean wanted to feed you bacon and eggs, but I know you have a sweet tooth, so I opted for pancakes with maple syrup instead.” Sam moved the tray from the nightstand onto the bed so Gabriel could reach it more easily. “Hungry?”

Gabriel was about to deny that when his stomach growled – loudly. “What…?” He had a hard time getting used to his powered down vessel’s demands. 

“That means yes,” Sam provided and handed him a plate with pancakes. “And while you eat, you’re going to listen.” 

Gabriel bit down on a comment he wanted to make, namely making fun of Sam taking charge in that way. He stayed silent instead, sensing that whatever was going on with Sam, the man needed to get it out of his system. He picked up the fork and started eating.

Sam felt relieved now that Gabriel seemed willing to listen to him and was behaving. “I want to thank you for what you did last night.” Seeing Gabriel was about to protest, Sam raised his hand decisively and stopped the archangel from objecting. “No, it really means a lot to me. You probably have no idea just how much.”

Gabriel almost choked up on emotion, but blamed it on the pancake instead. He really didn’t want to know where Sam was going with this. He sucked at dealing with emotions. He always had. It was best to keep a distance at all times, but Sam Winchester had different ideas. 

“I’ve had these nightmares for so many years. Sometimes, when I’m too tired to dream I get a night’s reprieve, but that’s rare. Most nights it’s Lucifer haunting my dreams. That time spent in the cage… It nearly broke me. And when Lucifer wanted me to say yes to him, so he could finally take possession of his vessel, he… He was relentless. I think I actually went insane for some time. My memory is a mess at best.” Sam shifted on his chair, giving Gabriel a look that balanced between hope and shame. 

“Sam,” Gabriel whispered the name and set aside the pancakes. If Sam was determined to address this, he had to man up, even though he’d rather run. But Sam stopped him once more.

“No, hear me out.” Sam broke off eye contact and stared at his hands, which had turned into fists during his speech. “Dean knows about the nightmares and he tried to help, he really did, but he didn’t know how. Death tried to help, but that didn’t go well. Who would have thought that you would succeed where they failed? Last night, I felt…” What had he felt last night? He wasn’t good at labeling his feelings either, but he was willing to try, no matter how awkward admitting this made him feel. “You made me feel safe.”

Gabriel really had absolutely no idea how to handle an emotional Sam Winchester, but he did know one thing though; making fun of the guy or spewing his usual witty comments wasn’t going to work. He had to reach deep down and be honest about it, even if that scared him. 

“I haven’t felt like this for a long time. I don’t know what you did last night, but thanks.”

Sam seemed to have finally finished his speech and now it was up to him to reply. If only he knew what to say! “Sam, I didn’t do anything special. I just tried to erase the damage my dear brother did. There’s no way to know if I succeeded, not until you go to sleep again.” But he had tried his best, and he was hopeful that the nightmares would leave Sam alone in the future. 

“I should have done so a long time ago.” Gabriel felt like apologizing in Lucifer’s stead, but held his tongue just in time. Such an apology would be meaningless coming from him. It would have to be Lucifer offering it. Sam suddenly shifted closer and stared at him, making him feel ill at ease. Now what?

“What did you do, Gabriel? How did you erase those memories and do away with the nightmare? What was that golden light that I saw and this warmth I felt?” Sam had bared his soul and hoped Gabriel would do the same. He wasn’t sure though. For all the drama that had made up the trickster, the archangel seemed to be the opposite character wise. He had seen it before; it usually happened when someone had been hurt too many times. 

Gabriel hesitated, but then reconsidered. What difference did it make to actually speak the words? He would merely confirm the things Sam already knew. “That was me.” It sounded lame, even to his own ears, but he was at a loss to explain himself. How did one explain the inexplicable? After releasing a deeply troubled sigh, he tried again. “One can say it was my soul reaching out to yours. You were in pain and I listened… I reached out with my very being.” Fuck, why was he admitting this and making himself so damn vulnerable? His flight instincts kicked in big time and he barely stopped himself from bolting from the room. 

Sam could tell this was hard on Gabriel. The archangel might not be aware of the unease he was radiating, but Sam was picking up on it. Why should Gabriel’s discomfort surprise him though? He had met God, or Chuck as he preferred to be called, and recalled an awkward conversation Chuck had had with Lucifer about what had happened after receiving the Mark of Cain. The whole mess concerning Chuck and Amara had also shed more light on the family’s problems. 

Was it such a surprise that Gabriel had had trouble communicating and getting heard by his family as well? In a way, Gabriel’s situation had been worse; the archangel had never had a brother like Dean to fall back on. Gabriel’s brothers had been intent on killing each other instead and Sam could easily imagine what being caught in the middle had done to Gabriel. 

“In that case I like you a lot better than the trickster,” Sam said after carefully thinking it over. “I would like to get to know you better, Gabriel, the real you.” And that might scare Gabriel, Sam realized that, but he wasn’t backing down. “Let’s do this one day at a time, yes?”

Maybe he could do that. Did he have a choice anyway? Sure, he could vanish on the two brothers again and do what he had always done; going back to being a loner. But did he still want that? He had always wanted to be part of a family, and in a way, Sam was offering him just that. The question was, did he have the courage to find out what it would be like? 

“Finish your breakfast,” Sam told him and Gabriel nodded rather sheepishly. Sam backed off, creating some distance between them and took his seat on the chair again. For one moment he wanted to ask the archangel how he was doing after everything he had been through, but then thought better of it. This wasn’t the right time for Gabriel to search his soul and do some emotion bloodletting; the archangel already was in an emotional uproar. It amused him to see Gabriel return to eating and even meekly sipping his tea. A new expression had appeared in those honey-colored eyes and Sam wondered what it was about. 

….

Gabriel had finished most of the pancakes and emptied that boring chamomile tea, just to see Sam smile again. After that strange conversation, Sam had grown quiet, returning to reading his book and Gabriel hadn’t felt the need to needle Sam, so they had spent the last hour in blissful silence. But now what? He was growing restless, and although his powers were miles from being recharged, he was growing edgy. He simply wasn’t used to such silent and comfortable moments. Did Sam expect him to do something? Act a certain way or say something? He could do with some instructions. In the end, he opted for, “Is Cas around?”

Sam placed the book aside and shook his head. “Not at the moment. And Dean is on a food run so it is just you and me.” Sam noticed Gabriel’s twitchy mannerisms and realized he needed to take action. “Why don’t you take a quick shower and then join me in the war room? We’re searching for ways to do away with Michael, preferably before he leaves his dimension.”

Gabriel was about to point out that he didn’t need to shower when he reconsidered. It might give him some privacy and he needed to get away from Sam for a moment. For some reason, logic thinking eluded him whenever the other man was near. “Great thinking, kiddo,” he quipped, but noticed the way Sam’s eyes narrowed. “I’m working on it. Don’t expect miracles over night. I’ve been the trickster for a long time.” And that realization raised several questions; he hadn’t been himself for centuries. Who was he beneath the mask? 

“I’ll make coffee and I expect to see you in the war room shortly. Don’t disappear on me, Gabriel,” Sam said, repeating his earlier warning.

“I won’t,” he whispered, still amazed at his own reactions. No, he wouldn’t make a run for it. He was going to stay and find out what it was like to be part of a family.

TBC

Part 3

Where the hell was Gabriel? What was taking him so damn long? Sam had expected Gabriel to join him some time ago, but there was still no sign of the archangel. Thirty minutes should have been enough for a quick shower and getting dressed. Had Gabriel broken his promise after all and taken off? He thought he had sensed a change in Gabriel, but he might have been mistaken. Maybe the trickster of old had made a comeback. Well, there was only one way to find out. 

Sam made his way down the corridor which led to Gabriel’s room, hoping that the archangel hadn’t run away again. Maybe it had been a mistake to put his trust in Gabriel. Maybe he was a fool for having opened up. What if that was the very thing which had made Gabriel leave? Then he would have only himself to blame.

Deciding against announcing his little checkup, Sam pushed the door, which was already ajar, open and looked inside. Nothing could have prepared him for the scene he was now witnessing. Gabriel must have taken that shower, as his wet hair clung to his face. Little droplets of water slowly slid down his shoulder and chest, and a small pool had formed beneath where the archangel was sitting on the floor. Gabriel sat pressed against the wall, next to the dresser and cowering like he had when Ketch had delivered him to the bunker. Messy, blond hair hid his face from view, but it was obvious that he was in pain. 

Wet and naked, Gabriel shivered and seeing it urged Sam into action. “What are you doing?” He collected a blanket from the bed and wanted to wrap it around Gabriel, but the archangel shuddered and tried to crawl away from him. Unfortunately for Gabriel there was no way for him to go, as he would either crash into the dresser or end up cornered against the wall. 

Gabriel eventually wrapped his arms around his knees and rocked himself slightly. Sam’s heart nearly broke upon seeing his distress. Maybe leaving him alone had been a mistake, but how had he been supposed to know Gabriel might suffer a breakdown? Trust him to end up with an archangel suffering from PTSD!

“Gabriel, I’m going to wrap this blanket around you and then move you to the bed. You can’t be comfortable like that.” He adopted the same caring tone he would when talking to a small child. “Nothing bad is going to happen to you. You’re in the bunker and you’re safe with me.”

Gabriel struggled and tried to free himself, but when the archangel finally calmed down, Sam succeeded in wrapping him up in the blanket. One step at a time, Sam reminded himself. Next was trying to establish eye contact. 

“Gabriel, please look at me.” To his surprise, Gabriel did as he was asked and Sam’s heart missed a beat upon seeing the lips, bleeding and once more sewn shut. “Why are you doing this to yourself?” Gabriel’s expression was wild and Sam wasn’t sure the archangel was coherent at the moment. “Don’t do this to yourself,” he pleaded, but Gabriel showed no reaction. Maybe the best thing to do was to repeat past actions.

“I’m going to cut that thread so you can breathe more easily and talk again.” Sam reached for the top drawer, opened it, and removed the small knife which he had also used that day. “I’ll take care of you. You’re safe with me,” he repeated, reassuring Gabriel like the archangel had assured him during the night when he had suffered from that nightmare. “I won’t desert you,” Sam promised.

Carefully he cut the thread and tried to remove most of the offending material. As he did, he noticed that Gabriel calmed down further and the expression in those golden eyes changed as well. “That’s it. You’re at the bunker and you’re safe with me. Your memories must have gotten the better of you and taken you back into the past. But Gabriel, you escaped Asmodeus’ lair.” 

A series of violent shivers rocked Gabriel’s body upon hearing the Prince of Hell’s name and Sam regretted having used it. “I’m going to move you onto the bed now. Please don’t fight me.” Gabriel had fought him that day when the archangel had been returned to them.

This time around Gabriel allowed it, and even cooperated, for which Sam was grateful. Once he had comfortably seated Gabriel on the bed, he pulled up the comforter and wrapped the archangel in his arms. What Gabriel needed the most right now was touch, human contact, and Sam was eager to supply it. 

Gabriel knew something was wrong. The last thing he remembered was going for that shower and the water sliding down his skin. He had no idea why it had triggered his memory, but it had, and he had hunched down in the shower stall, trying to keep himself from falling apart. He had failed though. He had found himself back in that tiny cell and the sounds and scents had returned as well. Asmodeus had been threatening him, wanting more of his grace and he had smelled blood from when the Prince of Hell had cut his skin. 

“Gabriel, listen to me. Listen to my voice. Follow it home if you can. I’m worried about you.”

That voice didn’t belong in his personal hell, but it sounded familiar none the less. Whom did it belong to and why did it urge him to find out?

“Hey, it’s me, Sam. Come on, Gabriel, you can do this. I have faith in you, remember? You’re stronger than Asmodeus. You burned him to cinder, don’t you remember? You took your revenge on him.”

What was that voice babbling about? Asmodeus was close, holding him down, constricting his movements and about to extract more of his grace! Struggling wouldn’t get him anywhere, he knew that; it would only earn him more punishment, but he still put up a fight. 

“Gabriel, I need you. Don’t do this to yourself. Don’t do this to me. Gabriel, I need you!” Sam was getting desperate and it showed in his voice. 

Someone needed him? Someone called Sam? Why did that name sound familiar? Did he know a Sam? Yes, he did, didn’t he? Sammy… “Sam?” he said, fighting himself a way back through his troubled thoughts. Sam needed him, the man had said so himself and he couldn’t let him down. 

“Yes!” Relieved, Sam nodded his head and searched Gabriel’s eyes, which grew focused again. “Thanks,” he whispered to no one in particular. He watched in wonder as the blood and wounds vanished from Gabriel’s face. He wanted to know what had happened, but knew it had to wait, as the archangel still looked bewildered. “That’s it. I’m not letting you out of my sight anytime soon.”

Gabriel slowly regained his senses and had a hard time believing the situation he found himself in. Was he really sitting here butt naked with Sam Winchester wrapped around him? “Sam, what’s going on?” On some level it worried him that he didn’t know how he had gotten into this particular situation. 

“You must have suffered a flashback as I found you here, sitting on the floor and with your lips sewn back together again.” Sam told himself to go slow. “I tried to reach you, but you were in a different place, maybe even time?”

“I was back there,” Gabriel admitted in soft whispers which were barely audible. “Back in my cell.” Just thinking about it made him want to throw up. He couldn’t recall ever reacting so emotionally before and he had been through a lot in his long existence. Looking Sam in the eyes, he realized he had scared the other man. 

“I’m sorry for that,” Gabriel offered, feeling terribly insecure. “You don’t deserve going through that shit again.” It was his mess and he shouldn’t burden Sam with it. Sam had more than enough to deal with himself. “It won’t happen again.” But he wasn’t sure he could keep that promise. Asmodeus had broken him, even though he loathed admitting it and recovery would take time. Maybe he should leave the bunker and find a place to lick his wounds and a way to deal with this instead of burdening Sam with his crap.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Sam said, taking a well-educated guess. Gabriel was trying to move away from him and the archangel’s expression had grown distant. “You are NOT leaving.” Personal experience had taught him that running away never worked. Gabriel had to find a way to deal with the torture he had suffered at Asmodeus’ hands. 

“I should, though,” Gabriel mumbled and offered Sam an apologetic look. “I’m not in my right mind. I spectacularly lost it and I don’t even know why.” Yes, he could disappear on Sam that very moment and ditch him again. He had regained some of his strength and would be able to pull it off, but then what? The truth was, whether he liked it or not, he was best off with Sam Winchester, simply because the other man cared about him. 

“Yes, you did,” Sam acknowledged, “but you also found your way back.” He’d almost added, to me, but refrained from doing so at the last moment. “You’re stronger than you think and setbacks are to be expected. I should know. I have been there and so has Dean. No one is going to think badly of you because you suffer from flashbacks. I’ll pull you back, I promise.”

“But why?” Gabriel pulled the blanket tighter around his frame, needing to feel sheltered. “Why would you take me on? I’m a mess.”

Sam took a moment to consider his reply. He had to be honest; he couldn’t do any less. “Because I like you. I know where you’re coming from and what you’re going through. Because I believe in you. I have faith in you, Gabriel.”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you have a thing for angels?” Gabriel tried for some wit, but wasn’t sure he could pull it off.

“That’s Dean,” Sam chuckled. “I think I prefer cheeky archangels.” It was the truth; he really did like Gabriel, especially since he had ditched his trickster persona.

During a moment of clarity, Gabriel remembered and then whispered, “I restored your faith in angels, didn’t I?” In order to add a light note, he quickly added, “In archangels of course, and I agree, since my brothers are dicks. Raphael –“ Sam raised an arm, reached for him, and placed his fingertips against his lips, effectively shutting him up and Gabriel stilled.

“I don’t want to talk about them, but you’re right, it’s good to know there is at least one archangel out there pitching for the right team.” Gabriel had made a valid point, but it wasn’t the whole truth. That realization was slowly sneaking up on Sam. It wasn’t just about his faith being restored; it was also about Gabriel himself. 

Sam had tried to deny the building attraction, but it was there. It had started subtly at first, but had grown stronger these last few days, ever since Ketch had turned up with a traumatized Gabriel and entrusting him with his care. Sam was fairly certain the attraction was one-sided though. Why would Gabriel feel the same way about him? It was best not to address that matter. Better to deal with unrequited love than messing up their budding friendship. 

Gabriel broke off eye-contact because the intensity of Sam’s stare was getting to him. The things he read in those eyes couldn’t be true; shouldn’t be true. He didn’t deserve such loyalty, and such obvious affection even less.

Realizing their situation was quickly turning awkward, Sam scraped his throat and said, “Why don’t you get dressed and join me in the war room? I’ll get us something hot to drink.” He had the feeling Gabriel might welcome some hot chocolate.

“Yeah, sure, I can do that,” Gabriel mumbled and stared at the wall, desperate to deny the emotions Sam was radiating. Nothing good would come of it!

TBC

Part 4

Gabriel felt torn between staying on the bed, safely tucked away in his cocoon or getting up and face the world. He knew that he was fooling himself into thinking that he actually had a choice when in truth there was none. He couldn’t stay like this forever and pretend he was no longer a part of this world.

After drawing in a deep breath, he pushed the blanket and comforter aside and got to his feet. Although he could use his powers to provide himself with clothes, he decided against it. It was best to preserve his strength. So instead he put on the sweat pants and long sleeved shirt he found in the closet. He added a vest just to feel another protective layer of fabric on his skin. After putting on some socks, he made his way into the corridor, not looking forward to joining Sam. 

The young man had truly upended his world earlier. Gabriel had never even considered the fact Sam might be attracted to him, for what was there left to be attracted to? He was nothing but a terrible failure. 

“Ah, there you are,” Sam said, welcoming Gabriel and beckoning him to join him in the study set next to the war room. He had lit the fireplace, hoping the warmth from the fire would tell the archangel that he was welcome indeed. “I made hot chocolate,” he added and pointed at the mug on the side table next to a comfortable, winged chair. 

“Thanks.” Gabriel sat down and wrapped his hands around the warm mug. He stared into the fire and wondered what had become of him. Had he really been reduced to this?

“You’re brooding,” Sam remarked and moved his chair closer to Gabriel’s. “My advice is not to over think it. Yeah, I know, that’s easier said than done, but I’ve been there and learned it the hard way. Just let things happen and go with the flow. It’s understandable that you feel low right now.” Sam moistened his lips, wondering if he should voice his offer or not. “If you want to talk about it, I’ll listen.” 

He doubted Gabriel would take him up on the offer though. For all the talking the archangel had done in the past, he had hardly ever offered anything personal. Gabriel gave him a lopsided look, confirming his suspicion. “If you want to do so later, you’re welcome,” Sam repeated, not willing to give up yet.

“So what are the problems we’re currently facing? What about heaven shutting down and this other world Michael?” Maybe focusing on something else would help. Maybe he might actually be able to contribute to solving a problem. 

Sam was relieved to hear Gabriel voice those questions. For some time he had been afraid the archangel had given up on himself. Hopefully Gabriel still had some fight left in him. “Let’s start with heaven.”

“Heaven is shutting down,” Cas said, walking into the room and taking in the sight they presented. Sam seemed twitchy for some odd reason and Gabriel was still low on grace. The normally so bright archangel’s core was only dimly lit. “I just got back from there.”

Trust Cas to turn up when least expected, Sam mused, but he was happy to see the angel. “Have they shut down yet?”

“No, but they’re making preparations. There are too few angels left to run heaven. Only nine of them up in heaven and two down here.” Cas hated being unable to take action. Standing by and letting things fall apart wasn’t his thing. Cas studied Gabriel closely. His brother had come through and proven that he was sincere in helping them. “You are an archangel, do you know of a way to create new angels?”

Gabriel wiggled an eyebrow. “Do I really need to tell you how babies are made, Cas?”

Sam chuckled in spite of their dire situation. It was good to see Gabriel’s wit make a comeback. “I doubt creating Nephilims is what Cas is suggesting.”

“Pity,” Gabriel deadpanned, enjoying himself while annoying Castiel. “I’m sure you would have welcomed the experience. Are you still a virgin, Cas?”

“That’s none of your business,” Cas replied and gave Gabriel an admonishing look. 

“Hum,” Gabriel whispered, cocking his head and studying Castiel in turn. “I do love a mystery!”

“Let’s get back to the problem at hand.” Sam hoped his intervention would work. Although he had always wondered just how deep the attraction between Cas and his brother ran, he had zero interest in actually finding out. Some things should stay private.

“What mystery?” Dean walked into the study, sipped from his beer and wondered what the hell he had just stepped into. All three of them looked damn guilty!

“How to prevent heaven from shutting down.” Sam accepted the beer Dean handed him and watched his brother take a seat on the nearby couch. Cas moved as well and came to stand behind Dean in a protective stance. Sometimes actions spoke louder than words, Sam mused.

“Ah that.” Yes, that was one of their many problems, though Dean considered getting their mother back his first priority. “You got any ideas on that?” He looked to Gabriel for an answer, wanting to keep him involved so the archangel couldn’t slip back into that apathetic state they had found him in. Yes, Gabriel had played pranks on them in the past, but Dean didn’t wish the kind of torture the archangel had suffered on anyone. He had spent time in hell and knew from firsthand experience that it would take Gabriel time to bounce back.

Gabriel shrugged; he wasn’t sure why they thought he would have any answers, not in his current state. It was a testimony of their faith in him; that they were willing to trust and support him. “Maybe, you might have some options left,” he whispered, not sure he should get involved.

“What options are you referring to?” Cas asked, growing instantly alert. After all, Gabriel was an archangel and might have access to information they weren’t privy to.

“You don’t necessary need angels in order to run heaven,” Gabriel pointed out. He stared at his hot chocolate and sipped in order to distract himself from the scrutiny he found himself under. 

“What are you saying?” Dean emptied his beer and set the bottle aside. He shifted closer and tried to capture Gabriel’s gaze, but failed. The archangel’s elusive behavior was uncharacteristic and worried him. 

“As you’re well aware of there are a lot of pagan gods out there.” Gabriel didn’t want to bring this up, as it reminded him of his recent dealings with Loki, but he did so anyway. “You have Anubis and Osiris in Egypt’s mythology and Hades in Greek. There are countless pagan gods who could take over and run heaven, if properly instructed.” He wasn’t sure it would work, but if the worst thing happened and the remaining angels bailed out, it might be an option.

“Wow, never thought of that one.” Dean blinked. Gabriel had really surprised him. But then again, the archangel had always been one to think outside of the box. 

“You said options, what else have you thought of?” Sam welcomed the change in Gabriel. This was the first time the archangel was actually thinking along and coming up with solutions.

“Well, if you want to create new angels then…” Gabriel gathered his courage and looked cautiously at Sam. “There might be a way, and I am not talking about creating Nephilims.”

“What then are you talking about?” Cas’ curiosity was piqued, but his patience was growing thin. Why was taking this so long?

“Dad created the archangels, that much is true,” Gabriel started and kept his gaze trained on Sam. The hope staring back at him from those green eyes awed him. Sam really thought he was going to make this right. “But he quickly got bored, so he created an angel, a Seraphim, who could take over.”

Cas cocked his head. “I never heard that before.”

Gabriel shrugged. “It’s not common knowledge, no. Dad kept it silent. But yeah…” Gabriel momentarily searched for the right words. “You remember Eve? The mother of monsters?” Sam nodded and Gabriel continued, “You could say there’s also a mother of angels.”

“I didn’t see that one coming either,” Dean remarked, blinking away his surprise.

“Clarify yourself,” Cas demanded, his patience growing thin.

“Her name is Azrael. You might have heard of her?” Gabriel still doubted the wisdom of getting involved. For so long he had tried his hardest to stay on the side lines.

“The angel of death?” 

Of course it was Sam, nose always buried in ancient lore, who answered his question, causing Gabriel to smile warmly. “Yes, you know her as the angel of death. Her name actually means, whom God helps. She is also the angel of resurrection. She’s the only force in this universe, except from dad and auntie Amara, who can create new angels or resurrect fallen ones.”

“That’s valuable information,” Cas said eagerly and moved closer. “Where is she? How do we find her?”

“Cas, slow down.” Dean wanted to think this over before blindly heading into this. “What do we know about her? Will she help us? And do we even want her to resurrect certain angels?”

“You’re probably thinking of Zachariah. Can’t blame you. Never liked him either.” Gabriel stretched his legs and pressed deeper into the comfort of the chair. Suddenly it struck him that he had never been part of a war council before. His father and brothers had never taken him seriously, and afterwards, he had always been on his own. This was the first time he was part of something bigger.

“He stays dead,” Dean stated resolved. “I hate that son of a bitch.”

Sam carefully considered everything Gabriel had told them. “It might be worthwhile to get into touch with her. Can we summon her?” Hearing Dean grunt in disagreement, Sam turned toward his brother. “We should consider all our options. We find out where she stands and then decide our next step,” he explained to his brother.

Dean reluctantly admitted to himself that Sam was probably right. “So how do we do this? Do we use a spell to summon her? Any spell ingredients Cas has to fetch?” 

“Could you summon God? Or Amara?”

Gabriel’s question surprised Dean, but he quickly regrouped. “No, we couldn’t.” If Chuck hadn’t revealed himself, they would never have found him.

“So she can’t be summoned?” Cas deduced. 

“Exactly! Ten points go the angel in the trench coat!” Slowly, very slowly, Gabriel was beginning to feel more like himself and with that, his sense of humor returned. 

“At least he didn’t call you a baby in a trench coat,” Dean quipped and shot Cas a wicked look. To his dismay, Cas ignored it, damn!

“Gabriel, go on.” Sam liked what he saw; an alert expression in those golden eyes and a subtle blush forming on Gabriel’s face. 

“You can’t summon her, that’s correct. But I can send out a call to her, which she might acknowledge or ignore. You need to realize one thing though, she’s a force of nature, guys, and not to be trifled with. You need to take this seriously. As far as her powers go, they rival Amara’s.”

“What do you mean by sending out a call?” Cas was trying to wrap his mind around this. Why hadn’t he known that God had stopped creating angels himself and had asked Azrael to take over? How many more things had been kept from him and the other angels?

“Just think of it as giving her a phone call,” Gabriel said and winked at Cas. “But I’d have to be at full power to be able to do that. I can’t reach her in my current state.” 

“Gabriel, didn’t she fall from heaven with all the other angels? Wouldn’t that mean she’s on earth?” Sam really hoped this was going to work. He liked this option the best, as pagan gods running heaven didn’t really appeal to him. He had the feeling that such a situation would only create chaos.

“Nope,” Gabriel replied. “She left once she had finished creating the angels dad wanted around. And by the way, Cas, you were the last one to roll off the production line.” Gabriel remembered Azrael’s smug expression and how pleased she had been after Castiel had been created. Maybe she’d had a hidden agenda even back then? “You really are our Benjamin.”

“That’s not relevant.” It didn’t matter to Cas that he had been the last angel to come into existence. “If you’re too weak to contact her then we need to focus on getting you back to full strength.”

“But there’s no more grace left, is there?” Gabriel knew the answer to that question, but asked anyway.

“Sorry,” Sam apologized, wondering if using Gabriel’s remaining grace to open up that rift had been the smart thing to do. 

“We thought it was our only option at the time,” Dean explained, “with mom and Jack stuck in Michael’s world.”

“Ah yes, Jack…” They had mentioned the Nephilim before, but Gabriel had never met him. How odd that Lucifer’s offspring had turned out to be one of the good guys. Maybe he should meet the kid.

“Yeah, Jack, you’ll love him,” Sam quickly assured him. He was certain Gabriel and Jack would get along just great.

Gabriel cocked his head and gave Dean a long look, knowing it was the older Winchester who called most shots. “And you don’t want what is left of my grace so you can open up that rift again? You could drain me like Asmodeus did.”

Sam gasped, but Dean wasn’t surprised. He had known Gabriel would test him. He would have been disappointed if the archangel hadn’t. “No, we won’t do that. Not without your permission. We’re not like that son of a bitch.” It still irked him that Asmodeus was already dead. Dean would have loved to hunt that bastard down and kill him himself. He had known a lot of sadistic demons, but what Asmodeus had done to Gabriel really made his blood boil. 

Dean was sincere; Gabriel knew that and acknowledged the other man’s anger with a nod. It stunned him to find out that Dean would have gone after Asmodeus if he hadn’t dealt with the Prince of Hell himself. He hadn’t thought Dean would care enough to do that. 

“Guys, this isn’t getting us anywhere.” Cas hated being the voice of reason, but he just wanted to make progress. There had to be a way to help Gabriel regain his strength.

Sam, who had listened closely and let his thoughts stray, coughed in order to gain their attention. Gabriel was the first to look at him and a smile stole onto the archangel’s face, which in turn caused Sam to shift nervously and damn the deepening attraction on his part. “Let me get this straight. Gabriel, Asmodeus drained you of your grace and then injected himself with it?” 

“That’s right, Sammy.” Gabriel wondered why Sam was bringing this up. Hopefully it wasn’t going to trigger another flashback. The last thing he wanted was to majorly lose it in front of them.

“He was addicted to the stuff?” Sam wanted to know. Maybe this would work.

“I suppose so. I wasn’t really rational at the time,” Gabriel offered in an apologetic voice. “My mind would drift. And then there was the pain…” Dang, he hadn’t wanted to add that last bit, but Sam’s eyes merely spoke of understanding and he relaxed. He might get through this as long as he shut out Dean and Cas and pretended it was just him and Sam.

Dean stopped Cas when the angel wanted to address Gabriel. Dean shook his head, telling Cas not to get involved. They had to do this on Gabriel’s terms or they might lose the fragile trust they had managed to build. 

“Is it possible that he created some stock for himself? If he was addicted to the stuff he might have taken precautions and started hoarding your grace, just in case?” It didn’t sound that far-fetched, Sam realized. It might be possible that Asmodeus had built up some supply. 

Seeing that Gabriel needed a moment to take that possibility into consideration, Dean whispered, “That sounds logical, Sam. He might have done that.”

Gabriel realized the same thing. He wasn’t sure Asmodeus had injected himself with his grace each time after draining him. The Prince of Hell could have locked it away in a safe place. “I don’t know, Sam.” He hated being unable to help. “I lost my mind back then.” Actually saying the words was still hard on him. “I wasn’t even sure what was happening most of the time.”

Sam moved his chair even closer to Gabriel, uncertain how the archangel would react to the suggestion he was about to make, but he feared the worst, as those amber-colored eyes still held a great deal of pain. “How do you feel about going back to Asmodeus’ lair and finding out?” 

Gabriel’s reaction was instant and fierce. “No, I’m not doing that! I’m not going back there ever again!” Gabriel yelled the words and shook his head repeatedly. “You can’t make me do that!” He wasn’t going back to his prison ever again. No longer thinking straight, he jumped to his feet and bolted from the room. 

“Well, that backfired,” Dean whispered, taken aback by Gabriel’s reaction. But a look at Sam told him his brother wasn’t that surprised; Sam must have expected for something like that to happen. 

“Let’s give him a moment and then I’ll go after him.” Sam actually felt relieved that nothing worse had happened. Even a powered-down Gabriel could do a lot of damage. He had been reminded of that when he had witnessed Gabriel taking out Loki and his children. Sam however hoped that he would get through to Gabriel, eventually.

TBC

Part 5

Gabriel ended up in his room and he slammed the door – hard – hoping it would tell them to leave him the fuck alone. He wasn’t going back there and they couldn’t make him. Hell, they couldn’t even make him leave this room if he didn’t want to! Actually, that sounded good, really good. He was going to stay in his room and wait this out. Let them deal with heaven shutting down, locating Azrael, and getting their mother back from that alternate dimension! None of it was his concern!

Gabriel sagged down the wall and pulled his knees close to his chest. He tightly wrapped his arms around himself and rested his brow on top of his knees. This was where he was going to stay, if necessary for all eternity!

How could Sam possibly think he might want to go back there? Why had the other man even suggested it? He had started to trust Sam and then this happened! Maybe he had been wrong to put his trust in the youngest Winchester. Perhaps he should go back to watching from a distance and find himself a nice, quiet place in the universe where no one could find him. 

“Gabriel, can I talk to you?” Sam knocked softly, not wanting to intrude, but still determined to make his intentions known. “I’ll go away if you want me to, but I’d really like to make sure you’re fine. I didn’t want to upset you earlier and am worried.” In the past this approach had worked best and he hoped Gabriel would allow him in. If only he could get Gabriel to talk about what had happened with Asmodeus, instead of the archangel closing down and hiding each time Asmodeus came up, that would be progress. “Gabriel, please?”

Sam was his weakness and Gabriel knew it, but how could he possibly deny the other man? It wasn’t Sam’s fault that he didn’t know how to deal with Asmodeus’ torture. It wouldn’t be fair to take that out on the young man. 

“Gabe, please?” Sam rested his brow against the wooden door and listened, hoping to get a positive answer. 

“Enter at your own risk,” Gabriel said eventually. “I don’t vouch for any actions on my part.” He was out of control and that scared him. He wanted Sam to know that and warn him in advance.

“Thanks, but I’m sure everything will be fine.” Relieved, Sam opened the door and tried to get a first look at the disgruntled archangel. Gabriel sat in his familiar spot on the floor, rocking himself slowly. Sam took one step into the room and halted. He wanted to give Gabriel time to get used to his presence. “How can I help? I’m sorry for causing this, how can I make it up to you?” He hated manipulating Gabriel, but at the moment it was his only option.

Did he want Sam close or did he want to be left alone? Gabriel was at a loss. 

“Now, there’s no reason to panic, I’m merely going to sit down next to you.” If sitting on the floor made Gabriel feel safe he would mirror that action, although he found himself in a cramped space. His long legs were getting in the way and he struggled to find a comfortable position. 

“What are you doing?” Gabriel eyed Sam closely, wondering why the other man kept moving about.

“Too little space,” Sam explained awkwardly. Next, he sought out Gabriel’s gaze and searched those amazing eyes. The panic seemed gone and the archangel had calmed down. Which was good – very good. “Can we talk or do you want me to be quiet?”

“Can you actually do quiet?” Gabriel added a weak smile, but had a hard time acting in a normal way. “Because I don’t think you can, Sammy.”

“Try me…” Sam was grateful to find Gabriel in a much calmer state. He had expected much worse. If Gabriel wanted to sit here in silence, he would shut up, although he didn’t think that really was the case. He was going to leave the initiative to Gabriel though. Gabriel however didn’t react; he merely rested the back of his head against the wall and stared ahead, probably not even registering the room he was in, but seeing Asmodeus’ lair in his mind’s eye. 

They sat like that for several minutes and then Gabriel’s head started to slide towards Sam. A quick look told Sam that the archangel’s eyes had closed and that he was quickly falling asleep. The floor however was far from comfortable and his back and legs were starting to hurt. It looked like it was up to him to take action after all. Deciding against speaking up, he slid his arms beneath Gabriel’s knees and shoulders instead. He expected Gabriel to fight him again, but the archangel remained still, so Sam pulled him against his chest and then moved them off the floor and onto the bed. 

He placed Gabriel on the bed and tucked him in. Next he sat down with his back against the headboard and savored stretching his cramping legs. He wasn’t sure if Gabriel was asleep or merely pretending, but wasn’t going to call him on it. Instead, he moved a little closer so he could slip his hand into Gabriel’s messy hair. Brushing some strands away from Gabriel’s face, he smiled. “You’re safe with me,” he whispered. “I’ll watch over you.”

… 

Dean wasn’t sure he should check up on them, but did any way. He had to make sure they were fine. It was easy to forget that Gabriel was an archangel with immense powers, even with his grace levels down he could do a lot of damage. Dean partly opened the door and peeked inside. He wasn’t that surprised to see Sam holding Gabriel in his sleep. What did surprise him was the fact that the archangel so easily accepted the touch. “How’s he doing?” Dean remained near the doorway, preferring to remain at a distance rather than crowding the room. 

“He’s been sleeping, thankfully,” Sam whispered, unwilling to wake Gabriel just yet. “My suggestion freaked him out.” 

Dean shrugged. He would have reacted the same way had someone suggested going back to hell after he had just returned from being tortured by Alastair. “Everything considered, he’s actually handling it better than I expected.”

Sam appreciated the gesture. “I think so too.” He had never wondered what Gabriel was really like. They had always assumed Gabriel was a trickster, since that persona seemed to fit him perfectly. Who knew the archangel would turn out to be quite different? “Seven years, Dean. Asmodeus had him for seven years.”

Dean cringed a little. He knew time passed differently when you were subjected to your personal hell. Those seven years probably felt a lot longer to Gabriel. “Is there anything I can do help?”

“Maybe read up on Azrael? I want to know what we’re up against should we succeed in contacting her. As far as Gabe goes? Not much.”

“Gabe, huh?” Dean wiggled an eyebrow at his brother. “Gabe’s really growing on you, isn’t he?” Annoying his baby brother was always fun. 

“Yeah, he is,” admitted a slightly blushing Sam. “Don’t read too much into it.”

“Sure, Sammy, you can do denial as no other,” Dean quipped and winked at his younger brother. “I’ll talk to you later.” Dean closed the door and headed back to the war room to discuss their situation with Cas.

Gabriel shifted in his arms and pressed his cheek against the fabric of Sam’s shirt. Sam wondered about his feelings, as he wasn’t sure what exactly he was feeling while holding the archangel close. Maybe it was a blessed sense of peace that had come over him. He couldn’t remember feeling this much at peace with himself before, even though knowing that his world would crumble if they didn’t find ways to do away with their problems. But right there and then nothing else mattered; the only thing that mattered was holding Gabriel and being there for the archangel. Acting on impulse, Sam pressed a chaste kiss onto Gabriel’s brow. 

The movement caused Gabriel to wake up. He didn’t open his eyes just yet though, wondering what that odd sensation was. It felt like someone’s lips caressing his forehead, which was strange to say the least. He was still processing that thought when the events of the last few hours hour came rushing back in on him. He had fled that study and ran here like a frightened child in desperate need of shelter. He had lost it spectacularly, as he had feared he would, and even worse, it wasn’t just Sam who had witnessed him falling apart. Dean and Cas had seen him make a run for it too.

Sam’s breath caught upon noticing Gabriel’s changed breathing, which told him that the archangel had woken up. And of course at the worst possible moment, when he had given into that insane need to kiss him. Luckily for him, he hadn’t gone for the lips. Gabriel’s eyes opened and Sam steeled himself for whatever rejection he found in them. 

Gabriel felt oddly insecure upon seeing the worried expression in Sam’s eyes. He hoped he hadn’t put it there. “You didn’t have to stay,” he mumbled, wondering what to do next. For some reason Sam seemed worried about that little kiss, but Gabriel had no idea why. 

“I couldn’t leave you on your own.” Sam sighed in relief now that Gabriel wasn’t addressing his indiscretion. He’d rather not explain why he had done that just now. “Maybe I shouldn’t have suggested returning to Asmodeus’ lair.”

Gabriel shrugged and elbowed himself upright. He yearned the loss of Sam’s close proximity and body warmth, but he wouldn’t be able to discuss this while Sam was distracting him. “No, you’re right. Someone should find out if he hoarded the stuff.” He couldn’t bring himself to say the demon’s name, not right now. “But don’t ask me to go back there.”

“Gabriel…” Sam shifted on the bed until he could easily make eye contact. Gabriel seemed hesitant to meet his gaze, but did so eventually. “I get that the thought of returning there freaks you out. I really do. I don’t want to return to the cage either, but you have so much to gain by facing what happened there. You should really consider this.”

Gabriel fidgeted with the blanket and averted his gaze. “What are you talking about?”

“You might not have nightmares like I do, but I’m sure that place and what happened there haunts you. Sure, you can run away from your fears, but you might end up stronger by facing them. Asmodeus is dead. You killed him,” Sam said, reminding Gabriel, hoping to get through to him. “You took back your power and you nailed that son of a bitch. Asmodeus is gone. He can’t hurt you anymore.” It was imperative that Gabriel fully realized that. “You utterly destroyed him.”

‘Yeah, I did, didn’t I?” A little of his old smugness made a reappearance. “I did burn him – extra crispy for good measure.” Recalling that he had destroyed Asmodeus did make him feel better. Sam was right; he reminded himself. Asmodeus was gone and couldn’t hurt him anymore. But the memories still haunted him, and he did fear his reactions upon entering Asmodeus’ stronghold. He was quite sure everything would overwhelm him. 

“Tell me,” Sam pleaded. “Don’t keep it inside. Talk to me, Gabriel. Please, I want to help.” But he could only do so if the archangel let him in. 

Gabriel wasn’t sure if burdening Sam with his fears was the right thing to do. “This isn’t your cross to bear,” he reminded the other man. 

“But I want to help, please Gabriel.” Sam had long realized that the archangel had a hard time denying him, especially when he turned on the puppy dog look and matching tone.

“Damn you,” Gabriel chuckled, caught up between amusement and the realization that Sam really was his weakness. The added please made him give in – each and every time. “What do you want to hear? That I’m scared to go back there? That I’d rather face Lucifer and fight my brother to the death? Yes, I’m scared shitless. You don’t know what that bastard did to me all those years.”

“He had you for seven years, did you know that?” Sam noticed Gabriel moving away from him and creating some distance. He allowed it, suspecting the archangel would eventually gravitate toward him again. 

“No, I didn’t.” Gabriel had never bothered to find out how long he had been a prisoner. “Felt more like seven hundred,” he admitted, hoping Sam didn’t think him pathetic. “I know it’s nothing but a minute compared to the time I’ve lived, but still… It was a very painful minute.” 

Sam admired Gabriel for talking about his deepest feelings. He hadn’t been sure the archangel trusted him to that extent. “You must have known what was going on in the beginning.”

Gabriel fought the urge to go back in time, but in the end, he failed and relived his demise. “They had rendered me helpless. I couldn’t defend myself against him and when he started to drain me of my grace, I grew weak.” Sam’s facial features contorted and Gabriel noticed it. “What are you thinking about?”

“If we had known you were still alive and Asmodeus’ prisoner, we would have tried to get you out, but you left that message and we were convinced Lucifer had killed you.” Sam realized he felt guilty for not checking if Gabriel had really died. They had been trying to put Lucifer back in the cage and had taken off to collect the remaining rings. 

“You couldn’t have known, Sam. I kept it a secret, remember? I wanted out.” Gabriel scoffed. “We both how badly that ended. It backfired big time. I only have myself to blame.”

“But you made it out alive and you’re here now,” Sam said, needing to remind himself of that. “And you’re recovering. Setbacks are a part of that. And honestly, you’re doing way better than Dean and I expected.”

“I am?” Gabriel had a hard time believing that, but if Sam said so... “So you want to go back to hell and find out if there’s any of my grace left? And you want to drag me along. Why can’t Dean and Castiel do that?”

“I told you,” Sam reminded him. “You need to move past this, to prove to yourself that you’re strong enough to do this. And you don’t have to do it on your own. Dean, Cas and I, we’ll be there every step of the way. Don’t take the easy way out this time.”

Rationally, Gabriel knew Sam was right. In order to move forward, he had to take this step. Emotionally, it was a different thing altogether. “What if I can’t handle being there?”

“I’ll be there too. Dean, Cas and I, we won’t leave you alone. You have us to fall back on. I won’t let you down.” That had come out a bit more passionately than it should have, Sam realized. How was he supposed to keep his feelings to himself when he said stuff like that? Gabriel wasn’t a fool; he would figure it out. His breath caught upon seeing Gabriel reach for his hand. The archangel entwined their fingers and pulled their hands against his chest. The move utterly undid Sam. Why had Gabriel done that?

“I’ll take your advice, though I’m not sure it’s the smart thing to do. I’ll tag along, but Sam, you have to promise me something.” Gabriel caressed Sam’s fingers, reminiscing on the fact just how much larger Sam’s hand was compared to his. 

“You have it. Everything you want,” Sam whispered breathlessly, staring at their joined hands and savoring the caress Gabriel was bestowing on him. He was quickly losing himself in the sensation.

Gabriel cocked his head and searched Sam’s gaze. It was all there, out in the open and easily to see. Sam freaking Winchester was in love with him. And maybe, it was even more than that, because Gabriel had the feeling this might be more than just a crush on Sam’s part. Sam had just offered to accompany him into hell and to stand by him, regardless of the outcome of that venture. Gabriel wondered if he was worthy of such love and devotion. There was only one way to find out though; to go ahead and face his fears.

This time it was Sam who had to help Gabriel focus on the situation at hand. “You wanted me to make you a promise.”

Gabriel chided himself mentally for losing focus. “Sam, promise me that no matter what happens, that you won’t leave me behind. The mere thought of being trapped back there, it…” It was enough to make him reconsider.

“I won’t. We won’t. We’ll be at your side. I promise.” It was a promise Sam easily made. “But Gabriel, don’t forget who and what you are. You are an archangel. You can kick butt if you want to. Don’t think you’re helpless.”

“Thanks for the pep talk.” Gabriel appreciated what Sam was trying to do. “Remind me of that when I’m back in the pit, will you?”

“I will,” Sam vowed passionately and squeezed Gabriel’s fingers in turn. They could do this - together.

TBC

 

 

 

Part 6

Dean looked up from the book he was reading when Sam and Gabriel walked into the war room. He liked what he saw. Sam seemed happy and that was a rare thing. The only thing he had ever wanted for his younger brother was to be happy, so if Gabriel was the one to accomplish that, it was fine with him. 

And then there was Gabriel, who was turning out to be someone he didn’t know. Not the trickster, not Loki, but someone else. He had met all the archangels and so far, Gabriel was the only one who wasn’t a complete dick. He hated Lucifer with a vengeance, Raphael had been a first class dick too and Michael was the biggest son of a bitch out of all of them. First, Michael had wanted him as his vessel and now Michael was threatening to destroy everything dear to him. That motherfucker had to go. “So, you’re back.”

“Stating the obvious, how observant,” Gabriel quipped, trying to appear unfazed. He walked up to the table and looked at Dean’s reading material. “Sam told you to read up on Azrael and you’re…?” He didn’t finish the sentence on purpose. 

“Yeah, I’m reading up on you, Gabriel.” He had no reason to deny it. “So, you’re the messenger boy.”

“I was. Dad would tell me where to go and what to say.” Gabriel cringed upon seeing the illustration in the book. Throughout the ages, humans had depicted him in flattering, and not so flattering ways. “I’m kinda surprised you’re reading up on me.” Gabriel pulled up a chair and sat down, but still made sure there was some distance between the two of them. 

“Doesn’t hurt to be well-informed. Bobby always taught us to make sure we researched.” Dean leaned back in his chair and took hold of his beer. After carefully sipping from it, he studied the archangel. “What did you decide?” No reason to beat about the bush. “Are we planning a trip to hell or not?”

Pretending disinterest, Gabriel selected an ancient looking book from Dean’s pile and opened it. Was it coincidence that it showed him a reproduction of the annunciation by Luca Signorelli? “I never was much of a fighter,” he reminisced. “I was happy to leave that part to Michael, but when Lucifer rebelled and gathered his army, I had to fight alongside my brothers. Michael welcomed the challenge; he had always wanted to know who was the better fighter out of the two of them. Raphael hoped to gain more power, especially with Lucifer out of the picture, whilst I…”

“You wanted it to stop,” Dean finished for him after exchanging a look with Sam, who remained quiet and seemed content to let him carry the conversation. 

“I wanted it over, yes. I never wanted them to fight.” Gabriel flipped a few pages ahead and happened upon a statue in the Pantheon in Rome depicting the archangel Gabriel. 

“Must be odd to find representations of yourself all over the world,” Dean mused. “It’s easy to forget that angels, and archangels like you, mean a lot to religious people in the world. We tend to forget that,” Dean realized, while exchanging a look with Sam. “We deal with so much crap, demons, alternate worlds and other weird stuff that we sometimes forget that angels symbolize hope for a lot of people.”

Sam wondered what direction Dean was taking this in, but remained quiet, curious to find out. However, he did seat himself next to Gabriel and joined the archangel in studying the portrayals in the book. 

“Well, those people didn’t know we’re actually assholes.” Gabriel suddenly closed the book with a bang and pushed it away from him. “But hey, the secret is out and at least you guys know we suck.”

“You don’t suck.” Dean quickly said, trying to salvage their conversation, as he did have an agenda. “You made mistakes, but then again, we all did. And like the rest of us, you’re trying to do better.” Gabriel eyed him suspiciously, so Dean knew he had to do better. “Cas doesn’t suck...” No, stop it right there… Dean knew he was digging himself into a hole and Gabriel would make good use of his ambiguity.

“He doesn’t? Such a shame. Maybe he needs a lesson in oral manipulation.” Gabriel couldn’t stop himself, he had to say it and wiggled an eyebrow. Dean merely shook his head in disgust and Gabriel was a bit disappointed that Dean didn’t call him on it. 

Sam, who had gone back to reading in the book Gabriel had closed earlier, chuckled. 

“What’s so funny?” Gabriel narrowed his eyes at the other man. Sam seemed gleeful, why?

“It says here that you’re the angel of purity.” Sam grinned wickedly. Dean huffed and Sam exchanged a conspiring look with his brother.

“Purity of the soul,” Gabriel clarified. “Of the soul!” Gabriel raised an admonishing finger, which caused Sam to laugh warmly. “Speaking of purity, where’s Cas?” 

Dean decided to get away from discussing angels and their aspects for the time being. It might be safest that way. “Scouting ahead to find out who’s currently in charge of hell. With Asmodeus gone there might be a power vacuum. If that’s the case, we can easily search the place and get out.”

Gabriel pulled the book away from Sam, closed it, and set it aside before the younger Winchester got him into trouble again. “We don’t spend a minute longer than necessary in that hellhole,” he told them. “Just a quick search and we’re gone.” Being back there would take a toll on him later. If he lasted that long, that was.

“Sure, a quick sweep of the place is fine.” Dean wondered if he should bring up the possibility of them finding remnants of Gabriel’s grace. The archangel had to know they needed it to open up another rift to Michael’s world. Did Gabriel assume they would just steal it?

Sam decided it was time to get involved. “Gabriel, there’s a distinct possibility that Asmodeus stored your grace.”

Gabriel didn’t want to get his hopes up only to be disappointed later. “I doubt that very much. He was rather addicted to it. He would get pissed if he had to go without it for too long.” That was when the torture had been at its worst, just before Asmodeus had decided to drain him again. 

“We should make our move now,” Cas announced as he appeared in the war room. “Hell’s a mess and divided. Several fractions are fighting amongst each other and the throne room is deserted. It might not stay that way.”

Sam looked to Gabriel for instructions. “What do you want to do?” He hoped Gabriel was up to facing the memory of his nemesis. “Are we going to hell?”

It was a hard call for Gabriel to make. He didn’t want to face Asmodeus’ legacy, but the thought of demons getting their ugly hands on his grace motivated him to agree eventually. “We’re going to hell,” he announced. He only hoped it wouldn’t be his downfall.

…

Gabriel needed a few minutes on his own to mentally prepare himself and retreated to his room. Sam offered to stay close, but he had asked the younger Winchester to give him some space and Sam had, albeit reluctantly. Gabriel smiled though, hearing Sam pace the corridor, waiting for him to emerge again. 

He drew in a deep breath and centered himself, checking how strong – or weak – he currently was. He was far from being up to his old tricks, but he was doing better. With a snap of his fingers, his outfit changed. It wouldn’t do to descend into hell wearing sweat pants. He exchanged them for black slacks, a green shirt, and a leather coat. Yes, that was more like it! Now he only had to walk into Asmodeus’ lair and keep himself from falling apart. Piece of cake – not. 

Upon opening the door, the first thing he registered was the relieved expression on Sam’s face. Had the younger man expected him to run away after all? He couldn’t rule it out. “Remember your promise,” he whispered.

“I will,” Sam replied firmly. “Here, you should have this.” Sam raised his hand and offered Gabriel the archangel blade. As far as Sam was concerned the blade should be with the archangel and having it might make Gabriel feel safer while being in hell. It supplied Gabriel with one more way to defend himself. 

“Are you sure?” Gabriel stared at the blade, coveting it. “You really want to part from it? It’s a powerful weapon.”

“Yeah, but you’re the archangel here. I’m not. It’s yours.” He suspected Gabriel might be struggling with self-esteem issues. The archangel might think himself unworthy of handling it. However, Sam hoped Gabriel would accept the blade. “Go on, take it.” 

Gabriel nodded and wrapped his fingers around the handle. “Thank you,” he whispered. “It’s good to have it back. It has been with me since creation.”

Sam started to walk toward the war room and Gabriel fell into pace next to him. “I don’t know much about archangel blades. Is there just one, or…?”

“There used to be four of them,” Gabriel explained. It only took a whisper of his thoughts to conjure the sheath, which fixed itself around his left forearm where it had resided most of his existence. Always hidden from view as he hadn’t wanted anyone to find out about it, but Sam was a different matter and he allowed the younger man to watch the blade slide into its rightful place. “Raphael’s blade was destroyed along with him. Michael carried it with him so it should be in the cage and Lucifer’s was destroyed during the rebellion. This one’s mine.”

“Who created them?” Sam welcomed the chance to learn more about the blades. One didn’t find this kind of lore in books, no matter how old and detailed they were. 

“Each archangel created his own blade. It wouldn’t have worked otherwise. This blade’s attuned to me.” Gabriel locked gazes with Sam. “You can handle it and use it to take out demons, but that’s about it. Only I can unlock its raw power.” Damn, it did feel good to have it back. It didn’t influence his grace levels, but it strengthened him in a different way. He felt more comfortable venturing into Asmodeus’ lair now that he had it back. 

Sam noticed the change that had come over Gabriel the moment he had taken hold of the blade. It was a good thing that Dean hadn’t fought him over his decision to return the blade to its rightful owner. Even Dean had realized that the blade was of little use to them as only an archangel could wield it. Having it back probably made a huge difference to Gabriel. 

Dean looked at them the moment Sam and Gabriel entered the war room. “Are you ready to go?” Gabriel seemed more confident than earlier, which was a good thing. He needed the archangel to realize his potential. 

“Better get it over with,” Gabriel replied as he nodded. His courage might desert him if they didn’t do this now.

“I can get us into the corridor leading up to the throne room,” Cas informed them. “It was deserted when I checked on it earlier. But the throne room itself was sealed off and too powerfully warded for me to enter it.” Cas turned toward Gabriel. “Will you be able to break that warding?” 

“I’ll try,” Gabriel said as he shrugged once. “We’ll see.” He hadn’t considered the possibility of them being unable to venture inside. Maybe this ordeal would be over before it had really started!

“Let’s do this,” Cas said and took them to hell. A moment later, they manifested in the corridor, which proved to be still empty. “We should make haste. I don’t know how long it will take them to detect our presence.” He slid his angel blade into his hand, ready to take out any enemies. At the moment, his priority was protecting Gabriel. It was imperative that the archangel remained safe. 

Dean moved toward the doorway and studied the intricate symbols that secured the throne room. “I have no idea what these are, never seen them before. Cas, are you sure you can’t get inside?”

“I can’t. The warding is too strong. It also reeks of Asmodeus’ magic,” Cas told them, frustrated that he couldn’t take them any further. “Gabriel, can you do anything?” He wasn’t sure the archangel was strong enough to help.

“Let’s find out.” So far, he was doing okay. He felt stressed, but hadn’t experienced any flashbacks yet. Gabriel suspected it would be a different story altogether once they were inside Asmodeus’ lair. He moved forward and reached out with being, stunned to find his own signature greeting him. When Asmodeus had warded the place, the demon must have been high on his grace and it had woven itself into the spell. Yes, he could break the warding, but did he want to? He had to, he reminded himself.

“You can do this,” Sam whispered, as he moved behind the archangel. “You’re not alone.” He had faith in Gabriel. 

Gabriel slowly nodded his head, raised his right hand, and placed its palm against the door. At first, a soft glow manifested beneath his fingers, then it spread across the door and flared brightly. “Done,” he announced, unsure how he felt about that.

Dean eyed Cas closely. “How strong was that warding?”

“Very strong,” Cas replied thoughtfully. “Gabriel must be regaining his strength.”

Gabriel decided not to enlighten them. He didn’t want them to know that Asmodeus had found a way to abuse his grace in such a way. He pushed the door open, but didn’t step inside. He couldn’t. He had frozen upon seeing the room that had been his prison for seven long years. “I can’t do this,” he whimpered and sought out Sam’s gaze. “Don’t make me do this.”

“I can’t make you do anything,” Sam said. “If you don’t want to do this, I won’t force you.” If he did, he wouldn’t be able to live with himself. “But I know you can do this. I have faith in you, but you need to have faith in yourself too.” Acting instinctively, he reached for Gabriel’s left hand and curled his fingers around the archangel’s. “It’s your decision.”

Gabriel averted his gaze and stared at the floor of his dungeon. Asmodeus had often thrown him onto the cold stone floor and had then proceeded to kick him bloody. A quick look told him there was no trace of his blood left, though. Maybe he could take a step inside – just one. 

Sam’s breath caught the moment Gabriel took that first and most important step and he moved closer. “You can do this, Gabe. I know you can.”

If Gabriel hadn’t been lost in thought he would have wondered why Sam had taken him to calling him that, but at that moment, he was doing his best not to drown in memories. Peeking to his right, he took in his cell, which had been his home for the last seven years and he nearly bolted from the room. The only thing that held him in place was Sam’s hand, wrapped around his and gently squeezing his fingers. “That’s where he kept me, like a dog…” 

Sam followed Gabriel’s gaze and briefly cringed before telling himself to get a grip on the situation. “That’s in the past. You’re free. Asmodeus is dead and this is in the past.”

Easier said than done, Gabriel thought, but didn’t say the words aloud. He didn’t want to discourage Sam who was trying his hardest to support him. He felt at a loss; what was he supposed to do now that he was here? He barely managed to keep his mind together!

“Where would the son of a bitch store your grace?” Dean had quickly scanned the room, including Gabriel’s former cell, and had no desire to stay any longer than necessary. “Cas, can’t you hone it on it, or something like that?” Cas gave him a puzzled look, which made him shake his head. “Forget about it. Let’s search the place.” Dean wasted no more time and started checking cabinets and cupboards, quickly followed by Cas aiding him. 

Sam moved in front of Gabriel, effectively blocking the archangel’s view of the cell. “Where would Asmodeus keep his supply? You know him best.” He hated doing this to the emotionally unbalanced archangel, but had little choice. “Gabe, focus!”

Gabriel shuddered and tried to rid himself of the lump of emotions that choked him up. He swallowed hard and tried to focus, just as Sam had asked him to. He looked about the room and his gaze was drawn towards the throne. “Asmodeus loved sitting up there, gloating. It was his favorite spot.” It was all he could think of.

“The throne, sure, that seems logical.” Sam used his hold on Gabriel’s hand to pull him along. “Sense anything? See anything that draws your attention?” 

Shivers ran down his spine, recalling how smug Asmodeus had looked when the demon had humiliated him. In his mind, he was back there, sprawled on the floor, covered in his own blood and Asmodeus taunting him. 

“Gabriel, please,” Sam pleaded and took another step closer. He slowly wrapped an arm around the trembling archangel and managed to catch his gaze. “You’re safe with me, remember? I won’t let you down. I need you to focus though. If your grace is here, you need to find it.”

Maybe it helped if he focused on the assignment Sam had just given him; find his grace, if there was any that was. His knees were wobbly and his legs almost gave out on him so he placed a hand against the throne. He really didn’t want to do this! But then he sensed something. Something was calling out to him.

Dean cocked his head upon seeing the surprise on Gabriel’s face. “You’re getting something?”

“Maybe.” Gabriel wasn’t sure. Perhaps it was just a lingering echo of his essence. 

Sam took a step to the side when Gabriel moved behind the throne. Suddenly, the normally amber eyes took on a blue color and Sam sucked in his breath. Something was definitely happening. Gabriel’s hand hovered at the back of the throne and suddenly a hidden compartment opened. The first thing Sam noticed was a bright, blue blaze emanating from within . “Yes, you found it!” If he wasn’t mistaken, he counted five vials filled to the rim with grace. 

“What did you find?” Dean came to stand next to Sam and felt equally relieved to see the vials. His first thought was that they needed that grace to open portals to Michael’s world, as many and as often as they needed to, but then he realized what he was actually thinking. If he did that, stole those vials and used Gabriel’s grace for his own purpose, he wouldn’t be any better than Asmodeus. “You got lucky,” he whispered, though he doubted Gabriel heard him. The archangel seemed lost in his own world.

Acting as if in a trance, Gabriel reached for the vials, but then reality crashed back in on him at hearing Dean’s voice. He wasn’t alone in here and the vials weren’t his for the taking. 

The angelic light in his eyes died and they returned to normal. Dean had a pretty good idea what caused the sudden change. “Sammy, make sure he gets his grace back and then we’re out of here, Cas and I will stand guard.” They hadn’t discussed what they would do if they happened upon Gabriel’s grace, but Dean knew Sam wouldn’t want it any other way. They wouldn’t abuse Gabriel’s trust, which was fragile to begin with. 

“Thanks,” Sam mouthed, relieved that Dean saw things his way. He would have tried to change his brother’s mind otherwise and he wouldn’t have given up easily. 

Dean motioned for Cas to join him in the corridor and nodded at seeing Sam’s approval. Yes, this was the only way to go. However, he did slide the syringe Asmodeus had used to drain Gabriel into a pocket. Maybe they happened upon Lucifer and could use his grace instead. That would work equally well.

Gabriel had a hard time believing Dean so he sought out Sam’s confirmation. “Are you sure about that? How will you reach your mother and Jack if you can’t use my grace?”

“We’ll find a way. A different way,” Sam confirmed. “Go ahead. It’s your grace; it belongs to you. Take it back.” He wondered if he shouldn’t join Dean and Cas instead of watching Gabriel. This had to be a personal moment for the archangel. “I’ll be over there, if –“ But Gabriel grabbed his hand and stopped him from turning around.

“You promised,” Gabriel reminded him. 

“Yeah, I did,” Sam nodded. “I just wanted you to have some privacy.” But Gabriel’s expression told him he was needed here. “I’ll stay, of course I will.”

“Thank you.” His hand shook as he reached for the first vial and he had to stop, afraid he would drop it. He could barely believe that this was about to happen; his graze would return to him and complete him.

“Let me help,” Sam offered upon seeing how shaken Gabriel was. He took hold of a vial, uncapped it, and offered it to the archangel. The blue strands moved into Gabriel’s mouth and nose and for one moment, those eyes lit up blue again. 

Gabriel braced himself against the throne, grabbing it tightly in order to support himself. This was overwhelming. And there were four more vials to go. Just how many times had Asmodeus drained his grace? How much of himself was lost?

“Let’s do this again.” Sam opened the second vial and watched once more how Gabriel’s grace returned to the archangel. Tears formed and leaked from those amazing eyes, which currently were a mix of gold and blue, as if two sources of energy were battling for dominion. “How are you doing? Do we need to take a break?”

“No, please continue.” He needed to be complete again. Needed to remember who and what he was. 

Sam did as requested and fed Gabriel the rest of his grace. When there was none left, he placed the empty vials aside and studied Gabriel. The blue light had taken full possession of his eyes and a strange vibration filled the throne room. “Gabe, what’s happening?” Gabriel didn’t answer him though and Sam looked over his shoulder at Cas, who might know the answer.

“He’s coming back into power.” Cas moved a little closer. “You could say his grace levels are at max.” After a pause, he added, “We’re watching his rebirth.”

Cas sounded awed, which said a lot and Sam backed a few steps away from Gabriel now that the vibration was intensifying. A shadow formed behind the archangel, showing unfolding wings which had never seemed more beautiful to Sam. One moment long, Gabriel’s form vanished and there was nothing but a blue beam of light with a warm, golden core that held the archangel’s blade. Ancient writing momentarily illuminated the blade and then it was over. Gabriel stood in front of them once more, looking exhausted, but with a giddy smile on his face. 

“Sammy, I need a hand here…” Gabriel stumbled toward Sam, who thankfully caught him. “That was unexpected. Someone could have warned me,” he mused in a tired voice. 

“And who might that have been?” Sam returned the teasing. “It’s not like any of us experienced anything like that before, or did you, Castiel?” Sam gave the angel a quick look.

“No, I’ve never witnessed the birth of an archangel before. I didn’t know that a rebirth was even possible,” Cas stated calmly. Their plan had worked. Gabriel’s power had been fully restored. They now had an archangel on their team – a fully armed Archangel, he corrected himself. Gabriel was one with his blade and could destroy Michael, and if necessary, Lucifer as well.

TBC

 

Part 7

Note- remember this is AU! Although I loved seeing Richard play both Gabriel and Loki I would have taken a different approach. Still trying to work along SPN canon though…

… 

It was Cas who took them back to the bunker, as Gabriel seemed absentminded and unable to focus. Sam, concerned for the archangel’s well-being, guided him over to a chair and made sure he didn’t take a tumble while sitting down. Gabriel was jittery, shifting constantly, and seemed restless. “Is something wrong?” Sam pulled up a chair and sat down next to Gabriel, grateful that Dean and Cas kept their distance.

“No, don’t worry about it,” Gabriel tried to still his movements, but his vessel needed time to get used to the higher vibration he was currently emitting. He hadn’t felt whole for a long time. It wasn’t just his grace settling down; the fact that the blade was with him, and once more a intricate part of him, needed to be processed too. “I’ll be fine.”

“I guess Chuck wasn’t kidding when he said that archangels are different.” Dean had never seen Cas act that way before. The angel was always balanced and in control. Gabriel’s power however seemed different. Looking at Cas, he wondered if his friend had anything to add.

“Archangels are primordial and heaven’s most fearsome wrath. They were the first and are the strongest class of angels, “ Cas confirmed. “And Gabriel is one of them. We might have forgotten that as he was too occupied pretending to be a pagan god, but he IS an archangel.”

“Thanks for the ego boost, little brother,” Gabriel managed, though he had a hard time concentrating. Finding Sam still watching him in concern, he explained, “My vessel needs time to get used to this level of power. It will take a few hours, but then everything will even out. It happened before.”

Gabriel’s explanation reassured Sam somewhat, but he still remained concerned. “Maybe you should rest. We should head for your room.”

Cas was about to point out to them that Gabriel merely needed to will it and he would be in his bed, but seeing Gabriel grab hold of Sam and allowing himself to be pulled to his feet stopped him from voicing that thought. He watched them leave and then turned to Dean. “I’m confused. Gabriel can take them there by merely willing it. Why does he want to walk when he’s unsteady on his feet?”

“Cas, buddy,” Dean said and grinned as he wrapped an arm around the angel. “Sometimes a little human touch does wonders.”

Dean’s answer didn’t really help. “Explain this to me.”

“I will,” Dean said, guiding Cas toward the kitchen. “But first, we’re making dinner. I’m starving.”

…

Gabriel stretched on the bed, savoring the comfort of the mattress beneath him. This was exactly what he needed – some time off his feet and to rest. His body burned, as its blood vessels, synapses, sinews and organs were getting used to the returned grace. The mattress moved again, this time because Sam was lying down next to him. Gabriel sighed in bliss and moved a little closer, leaving it up to Sam to hold him or not.

Sam didn’t have to think twice and wrapped his arms protectively around Gabriel. “You feel hot,” he noticed, now that his fingertips touched bare skin. “You’re burning up!” Shouldn’t he be doing something? “Is your vessel going to hold? I remember Raphael and Lucifer leaving behind a large number of severely damaged vessels; people who never recovered from being possessed or even died.”

Gabriel kept his eyes closed and rested his head against Sam’s shoulder. As long as he didn’t have to move and could rest, he might share a little story with the curious young man. “This is different. We managed a symbiosis. He’s become a part of me like I’m a part of him. We’re stuck with each other, but that’s by choice. I take good care of this body. I promised him that.”

Sam had wanted to ask Gabriel earlier about the fact that his vessel wasn’t burning up or damaged. He recalled Lucifer jumping from one vessel to another, leaving dozens of dead bodies in his wake. “I did wonder about that. Want to tell me?” Sam maneuvered Gabriel closer and made sure the recovering archangel was resting comfortably. 

“Why not? You deserve a little bedtime story for keeping your promise.”

Sam chuckled. “You didn’t really need me. You managed just fine. You’re stronger than you think!” 

“Don’t, Sam. If you hadn’t been there to hold my hand I might have bailed out.” Gabriel still had a hard believing he had actually succeeded in getting his grace back. He still expected to wake up in that little cell and to find Asmodeus hovering over him, screaming at him that it was just a bad joke!

“You were going to tell me about your vessel,” Sam reminded him. The scholar in him wanted to find out more.

“Ah, yes.” Gabriel sensed his body further attuning to his energy’s vibration and it stopped trembling. Next his core temperature would go down. “It started more than two hundred years ago in Scotland. A young priest called Martin Dunaid exchanged the city where he was born and raised for the countryside. He found himself stationed at a little church in Kilfinan.”

Sam noticed that Gabriel’s skin was cooling down, just as the archangel had predicted. “What happened?” He loved listening to Gabriel, especially now that he was learning something personal. 

“You may think he fell in love, but nay, he didn’t. He was a firm believer and didn’t stray from his path.” Gabriel smiled ruefully. Maybe things had ended up differently if Martin had succumbed to love and lust. “What did happen was a large pack of werewolves settling down in the neighborhood. Martin noticed members of his congregation disappearing and some villagers no longer attended mass. He suspected the devil was at work and gathered his courage to set out to search the mountains.”

“Not a smart move if he wasn’t a hunter,” Sam remarked, enthralled.

“No, it wasn’t. He didn’t even take a weapon with him. Just the bible, a cross, and some holy water. You can probably guess what happened next.”

“The werewolves found him.” Sam was fairly sure he had reached the correct conclusion since Gabriel chuckled softly. 

“It was the other way around; he found them and thought he could exorcise them. The demons thought him mad and hunted him down the hill and back into the little village. Martin ran like hell and realized they were toying with him. They could have easily killed him. He sought refuge in his church, a small, white building surrounded by ancient graves and tombstones. He threw himself at the altar and started praying.”

Sam slid his right hand up Gabriel’s back and massaged the tight muscles near the nape of his neck and shoulders. He hadn’t fully realized it, but coming back into power was taking a physical toll on the archangel. “Don’t stop now,” he urged Gabriel on.

“You’re distracting me by doing that,” Gabriel said and purred softly at finding those muscles finally relaxing. “Continue that and I’ll continue my story.”

“You have a deal.” Sam smiled at hearing the soft mews coming from Gabriel’s lips. 

“Instead of calling on God or Michael, he prayed to me and begged for my help. You see, the demons wanted him to suffer and instead of going after him, they went after the villagers. Martin heard their dying screams and the walls and windows of his little church had turned red. The werewolves wanted to drench that idyllic white church in blood.”

“And you decided to answer his prayers?” Sam hadn’t expected anything like this. After all, this was Gabriel, who was always mouthing off about porn stars. This was a surprisingly serious story.

“I did. I happened to be listening and decided to destroy those werewolves. After taking care of the threat, I…” Gabriel wavered, but then continued. “It was a horrible sight to behold, Sam. They had killed most villagers, women and children too and the graveyard was drenched in blood. I couldn’t help them; they were dead, but Martin was still alive. He had stepped outside and couldn’t believe his eyes. I tried to comfort him the best I could, but… his mind had suffered. I couldn’t do much to help him. He was burdened down with guilt and pleaded with me to bring them back to life, but I couldn’t.”

Gabriel shifted in his arms and Sam protectively moved him closer, realizing there was more. “What happened next?”

“He dedicated the rest of his life to hunting monsters. In a way, he became a hunter.”

“You helped him,” Sam realized. “You told him what to do, how to track down demons and how to destroy them.”

“Guilty as changed,” Gabriel admitted. “We teamed up. Sometimes he happened upon an overwhelming force and was outmatched. We came up with the idea of me possessing his body at times like that. The first few times we only merged for minutes. Later on, he managed to contain me for longer periods of time. I took great care not to hurt him, or damage his body.”

Sam only now realized just how careful and thoughtful Gabriel must have treated Martin in order to leave him undamaged. “What caused you to take control permanently?”

“Two things. Firstly, my dear brothers continuing to fight amongst each other and me wanting out, as you well know. And then Martin met his match. I wasn’t around to help and he decided to take out a nest of vampires by himself. He never stood a chance. He was dying by the time I found him and when I asked him to help me get away from my family, he said yes. I had found a way out.”

“And you hid.” Sam understood why Gabriel had fled heaven, but he didn’t agree with it. 

“It helped that I came across Loki some years later and he changed his appearance to match mine so he wouldn’t be recognized. He needed to stay underground too as Odin had decreed eternal suffering on his part. But yes, I hid, much like the coward I am.”

“You’re no coward,” Sam mused aloud as he moved his fingers into Gabriel’s hair. “Your family threw a lot at you and you had to take care of yourself. I get that, I really do. It’s why I left to study instead of continuing the family business.” Sam chuckled. “And look where it got us!”

Gabriel slightly raised his head to make eye contact with Sam. He hadn’t wanted to address this quite yet, but maybe he should. “Sam, where exactly is that? What do you want out of this?”

Sam wasn’t expecting those questions. “What do you mean?” he asked, buying himself some time. Was Gabriel really bringing up his attraction?

“Sam, don’t do that. You know what I’m talking about. You actually went to hell just to hold my hand in case I lost it. You’re here in bed with me, holding me, comforting me. You don’t do things like that unless you have feelings for that person.” Gabriel realized it was indeed up to him to bring this out in the open; Sam wouldn’t have done so. “It’s in your eyes, you know. Each time you look at me. I’m not that blind, give me some credit. You’re in love with me.”

Sam didn’t deny it since it wouldn’t get him anywhere as Gabriel had already figured out the truth. “And how do you feel about that? Does it make you uncomfortable?”

“Sammy, would I be here, in your arms, if it did?” 

Gabriel’s statement made sense; of course it did, but Sam had difficulty believing Gabriel felt the same way about him. And even if he did return his feelings, how seriously would the archangel take this? “I guess not,” he replied, unsure how to address his real concern. “Gabe, I’m not into one-nightstands,” he said eventually after careful consideration. 

“You won’t believe this, but neither am I. Not when it comes down to love. That’s serious business. Sure, sleeping with porn stars is nice, but it doesn’t compare to the real thing.”

Gabriel’s words surprised Sam, who didn’t quite expect that reaction. “So, you would give this a fair chance?”

“With you? Yes definitely, but Sam, you need to realize I’m difficult and complicated! A relationship with me won’t be easy, let alone a romantic one. I can be damn infuriating and elusive where my feelings are concerned, and you might reconsider down the road. You need to realize that what you see – this vessel – and what’s occupying it – an archangel – are two very different things. And then I’m not even talking about my charming family who will complicate matters further! If you want to do this, you must do so with eyes wide open.” That was important to him. Wanting something and actually committing to it were two different things in his book.

Sam nodded in understanding; he appreciated Gabriel discussing this in an adult and serious manner instead of making fun of the situation. It confirmed his suspicions that there was more to the archangel than he had thought. “I know that, and I’m not deluding myself. Gabe, do you think I’m an easy man to love? I’m not. And then there’s the life I lead and the shit happening to me all the time. Do YOU have any idea what you’re getting yourself into if we do this?”

“Looks like we’re both mad enough to actually do this.” Up until that very moment Gabriel hadn’t fully realized that they had somehow already committed to their relationship. They were in this together. “If you’re willing to try, so am I.”

“Oh, I am!” Sam declared passionately. “Can I kiss you now?”

“You don’t waste time, do you?” Sam’s enthusiasm took Gabriel aback and he wondered if the younger man really understood what he had just gotten himself into. “Explicit consent is a big thing for you too?” he said jokingly as he crawled atop of his new lover. 

“Yes,” Sam confirmed, “it is.” Deciding to stop wasting time, he brought his arms up behind Gabriel’s back and pulled him close. He intended to start slowly, but when their lips finally met, he failed to hold back. Passionately, he explored Gabriel’s mouth, tasting him for the first time. His body reacted accordingly and he grew hard.

Gabriel wondered how the hell Sam was getting air while kissing him like that. Sam’s passion took him aback as he hadn’t expected it. Beneath him, Sam had grown hard and Gabriel realized just how much the younger man wanted him. It was quite the surprise. “Sam… Sammy,” he whispered after breaking off the kiss. Sam panted sharply and those green eyes had taken on a dark hue due to desire. “You need to slow down.” He couldn’t believe he was saying this, but he was. 

‘Why?” Breathless, Sam placed his hands on either side of Gabriel’s face. “Why did you stop?”

“Because we should go slow, and I can’t believe I’m saying this either, believe me.” Gabriel rested his brow on Sam’s and looked him in the eye. No more hiding, no more pretence – he was done being the trickster. 

“I don’t want to slow down,” Sam shook his head. “I don’t want to wait.”

“Sam, listen to me. You have to slow down.” In order to soften the blow, he kissed Sam’s brow and caressed the other man’s face. “Believe me, I want this too, but not like this. We need to take our time and do this right. I don’t want us to have casual sex and regret it in the morning.”

Sam studied Gabriel and upon reading the expression in those honey-colored eyes, he calmed down. Maybe Gabriel was right. He should think this through and give them time to deepen their relationship first. “Maybe you’re right,” he agreed reluctantly, “but I still don’t like it!”

“You don’t have to,” Gabriel confirmed. “I don’t know about you, but I’m still trying to understand what just happened.”

That was true for Sam as well. “I didn’t think the feeling was mutual.” He hadn’t dared to get his hopes up. “But maybe I should have known,” Sam admitted after Gabriel looked at him in a reprimanding way. “Why would you let me hold you if you didn’t like me in turn? You’re right about that.”

“Smart boy,” Gabriel quipped and ran his fingertips along Sam’s jaw line, before kissing him on the lips. 

Sam controlled the urge to take control of the kiss and adjusted to Gabriel’s slower and tender pace. After a while, he felt like losing himself in the kiss.

“Sam, Gabe, come and get it. Dinner’s ready!” Dean banged onto the door, enjoying startling them. He had been listening in on them and had caught whispers, but hadn’t been able to make out any words. Knowing Sam though, the two of them probably were in bed together and doing more than just sleep! “It’s hamburgers and beer. I might share the pie, if you get your asses into the kitchen on time!”

“Dean, damn it!” Sam cursed his brother’s bad timing. “He’s doing that on purpose,” he whispered into Gabriel’s ear. Sam buried his fingers in Gabriel’s messed up hair and brought him in for another kiss. 

“Sam, are you listening?” Dean banged harder this time and took a step away from the door just in case Sam was going to throw a tantrum. 

“Go away, Dean!” Sam shouted in frustration. Gabriel however, seemed to find their situation amusing as he was giggling. “Not funny,” Sam stated for good measure.

“Saved by Dean.” Gabriel freed himself of Sam octopus’ like hold and sat up. “You must be hungry and I’m going to steal Dean’s pie.”

Sam groaned, realizing Gabriel was determined to take this slow. “And afterwards?” He ran a hand through his hair, trying to soothe the worst mess. 

“Afterwards, I’ll move in and make your room, and more importantly your bed, mine.” Gabriel wiggled an eyebrow, knowing hearing that would please Sam.

“Oh, yes, you’re definitely moving in. I need to keep an eye on you so you can’t get into trouble again.”

“Too late, I’m afraid.” Gabriel leaned in closer and deposited a butterfly light kiss onto Sam’s pouting lips. “You ARE trouble, Sam Winchester and there’s no way I’ll let you out of my sight either.”

The comment made Sam chuckle too. Maybe taking things slow wasn’t a bad thing after all.

TBC

Part 8 

Dean only needed to take one look at his baby brother to know what was going on. Sam always had this certain expression when he was in love and it was there now. Shifting his gaze to Gabriel, Dean found the archangel hovering over Sam and giving him that look. Okay, so those two were getting together – no real surprise. “Hungry?” he asked his brother. 

“Yeah, sure.” Sam hoped that Dean wasn’t going to address his deepening relationship with Gabriel just yet. He needed a little time to get used to their changed situation. 

Dean served Sam his meal and added a bottle of beer for good measure, which meant his eye wasn’t on the pie the entire time. When he turned around to cut it, he found a large piece of it missing. His eyes narrowed and honed in on Gabriel who was enjoying eating it. 

“Son of a bitch,” Dean whispered from between his teeth, but then shrugged it off. Gabriel had earned his pie today. He sat down and started on his meal. He even ignored Gabriel when the archangel walked over to the fridge and picked up a beer. “Feeling quite at home, aren’t you?” he couldn’t help remark.

“Home’s where Sam is,” Gabriel quipped and closely examined Dean’s reaction. “You got a problem with that?”

Sam almost spat out the beer he was sipping and stared at Gabriel in shock. What the hell…?

“Nope, that’s fine with me. Just keep the noise down at night. I’m a light sleeper,” Dean teased in turn.

Gabriel knew he should stop, but went ahead anyway. “I don’t need to sleep at all, so tell Cas to keep the noise down too. I’ll hear it.” He mischievously wiggled an eyebrow.

Sam and Dean looked at each other and the older Winchester raised his eyes to the heavens. “Please, not another one.” After dramatically rolling his eyes for good measure, he added, “You’d better stay away from the rest of my pie.”

“Oh, so forceful, does Cas get off on it?” Gabriel savored Dean’s shocked expression. Two could play this game. “Where is he anyways?”

“Cas went back to heaven to tell the remaining angels about your plans. He’s trying to convince them to hold on and to not shut down yet. Speaking of your plans, now that you’re back at full power, how about contacting this angel of death? What’s her name again?”

“Azrael,” Sam supplied and pushed his empty plate aside. Damn, he had been hungry. “Dessert?” he asked Dean and gave him a pleading look.

“Sure, Sammy, you’ll need your strength if you want to keep up with mister Playboy over here.” Dean handed his brother some pie. Dean marveled at the way Sam’s expression suddenly changed. What was wrong?

“This isn’t a one-time thing, Dean. Gabriel and I committed to this relationship. I want to make this work.”

“And do you too?” Dean asked Gabriel. He couldn’t help feeling protective of his little brother. If Gabriel ever hurt Sam, then he would hunt down the archangel. 

“Yes,” Gabriel replied in a sincere tone. “We talked it over. We’re in this together.” Dean might have a hard time believing that though. Gabriel realized that he didn’t seem like the faithful kind after everything they had learned about him. 

“I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt,” Dean said eventually in his best parental voice. 

“But should I hurt Dean, then you’ll come after me.” Gabriel knew Dean meant business. “I won’t hurt him – not willingly.”

Dean nodded, knowing darn well that their lives weren’t easy and difficult times were ahead. “Now, let’s get back to business. You need to contact Azrael and convince her to create new angels.” Now that they had finished dinner, Dean wanted to take the next step. “How do we do that?”

Gabriel walked over to the kitchen counter and poured himself some coffee. “Let me finish this and then I’ll try. We have to move outside though. This bunker causes too much interference. I need to be in the open to send out that call.” 

Sam cringed upon seeing Gabriel add a hideous amount of sugar to his coffee. “How can you drink that?” 

“Keeps the metabolism going,” Gabriel said and sipped. Catching sight of the books on the kitchen table, he walked over to the pile and checked on them. “Reading up on Azrael after all? No longer interested in little me?”

Dean gave Gabriel the evil eye and cocked his head. He decided against starting their bantering once more. It was time to get serious. “I don’t know that much about her and it’s hard to find any useful information on her. I merely found confirmation of what you told us; that she is the angel of death and apparently mercy as well. I can’t find any reliable information on the resurrection thing you mentioned.”

“No, you wouldn’t.” Gabriel wasn’t sure how much information to divulge. “She’s different. Always has been. Hard to predict, impossible to influence. She’s a loner by choice. She’ll either help us or completely ignore us.”

“What do you think she’ll do? You seem to know her rather well.” At least, that was the impression Sam was getting.

“We got along,” Gabriel said diplomatically. “I was one of the few she tolerated.” In truth, he had always felt connected to her. They had both been different. 

“You want her to contact us, don’t you?” Sam realized.

“Yes, she was a good friend. Maybe the only one I had in heaven.” Gabriel put down his mug. “Let’s do this.” He wanted it over with. This conversation was bringing back unpleasant memories. 

Sam shrugged upon seeing Dean’s puzzled gaze. “I have no idea what’s going on either,” he told his brother. But maybe he would find out later. “Let’s go after him.” He hadn’t been joking when he had said that he was going to keep a close eye on Gabriel. 

They followed him out of the bunker and after scanning his surroundings the archangel headed for a pasture. It was a green meadow with no trees which stretched out for several miles. 

Gabriel came to a halt and turned around. “You had better stay at a distance. I’m not sure how powerful this is going to be.”

For some reason Dean flashed back to Cas accidentally burning Pam’s eyes, causing her blindness. “Do we need to close our eyes?”

As Gabriel’s senses were heightened for what he was about to do, he involuntarily picked up on Dean’s thoughts. “No, you don’t. I won’t hurt you. Can’t promise you won’t feel nauseous afterwards though. If I remember correctly, this kind of vibration is hard on the human stomach.”

“You did this before?” Dean asked.

“Once or twice yes, when I needed to contact another angel. Now be quiet and let me concentrate.”

“I sure hope he knows what he’s doing,” Dean whispered. 

“I’m sure he does.” But Sam didn’t know what to expect either. “I have faith in him.”

Hearing that, Gabriel smiled, but didn’t comment on it. He closed his eyes, focused within, and gathered his power. Now came the tricky part; channeling it and adding a message to it.

The white glow started subtly at first. It originated from Gabriel’s hands and proceeded to wrap the archangel in a blanket of light. 

“What the…?” Dean’s eyes widened and he found himself moving back.

“Yeah.” Sam was stunned as well, but stood his ground, recalling Gabriel’s reassurance that they were safe. The white light intensified and suddenly the air around him started to vibrate. Sam had never experienced anything like it before and watched on in awed fascination. Lightning erupted from the liquefied form and shot up towards the sky, only to spread in every possible direction. 

“There’s something you don’t see every day.” Dean seldom felt humbled, but this was one of those moments. This was power, pure, unbridled power. Gabriel was right though – the constant buzzing was making him queasy. Maybe he shouldn’t have had that last piece of pie. Just when he thought he was going to throw up dinner, the buzzing stopped. The light faded, then died. For one moment, the earth was quiet, but then birds started singing. 

Sam quickly walked up to Gabriel and went to stand in front of him. White light still filled Gabriel’s eyes and the archangel seemed to float in the air. “Gabe, are you okay?” 

“Fine, Sam. Just give me a moment.” Gabriel pulled his power back and locked it away. “Better?” 

“Yeah.” Sam felt breathless. “I’m pretty certain your call got through. I’ve never seen such power before!”

“Not power exactly,” Gabriel informed him. “That was just me playing messenger boy. It’s been a while and I’ve become rusty. Happens when you stop honing your talents.”

Sam couldn’t help it; he laughed. It was his way to release the built-up tension.

“You should have seen Mary when I appeared to her. The poor girl made a run for it. It wasn’t the calm and dignified annunciation you read about in the good book.” Gabriel winked at his lover and wrapped an arm around Sam’s shoulder, guiding him towards the bunker. “Let’s go back inside. I can do with more pie or hot chocolate, just something containing loads of sugar.” As they passed by Dean, Gabriel quipped, “Close your mouth, Dean.”

Dean promptly did and shook his head in bewilderment. “And I thought I had seen it all.” He decided against joining Sam and Gabriel just yet, suspecting they might want some privacy and to be perfectly honest, he wanted to remain in the open a little longer. Eventually he sat down, leaned his back against the trunk of tree, and stared at the darkening sky, hoping Cas would join him shortly.

…

“Where do you want to go?” Sam asked as they headed back into the bunker. He kept stealing looks at the archangel, who still emitted a low humming vibration. Was Gabriel even aware of that? 

“Your room.” Gabriel reached for Sam’s hand and curled his fingers around it. He hoped he hadn’t spooked Sam with that little display, but they had asked for it! “Are you okay?”

“Head’s still reeling from what I witnessed just now. I thought of you as the trickster for a long time. You see, Cas was right; I never really realized that you’re something else entirely. You made it hard for us to see beneath your mask.”

“I wanted it that way.” Gabriel halted. “Do you mind detouring to the kitchen first? It holds all kind of sugary food.”

“Yeah, what’s up with that? While acting as the trickster, I understand your obsession with candy, but you don’t have to pretend anymore.”

“As I said before, it keeps the metabolism going. I promised Martin to take good care of his body and I found that sugar really helps when it comes to repairing any damage I might have done to it.” Gabriel didn’t mind Sam knowing about that. It might even come in handy some time. “It might be poison to humans, but for me…” He wiggled an eyebrow. 

Sam nodded in understanding. “Then let’s go get you some.” Sam leaned against the doorway while Gabriel searched and raided the pantry. Sam’s amusement grew upon seeing Gabriel gathering chocolate bars and muffins in his arms. “Are you sure that’s enough?”

“It’ll do for now,” Gabriel said and took a bite out of his first muffin. “Now, lead on!”

Sam shook his head in mild exasperation and guided Gabriel to his room. It was a good thing he had returned Dean’s dirty magazines some days ago. Gabriel would have made fun of him otherwise. Sam opened the door and stepped aside to let Gabriel, who had moved on from muffins to chocolate bars, inside.

“Like what you did with the place,” Gabriel teased and turned around to look at his lover. The tension was once more building, but before he considered doing the dirty deed he wanted to talk to Sam. “It’s way past your bedtime, young man,” he teased Sam. “Ready to turn in for the night?”

“Yeah, just let me take a quick shower.” He hadn’t had a chance to do that since he had been looking after Gabriel. “Make yourself comfortable,” Sam said and gestured at the bed. He hoped the archangel got the hint and then disappeared into the bathroom. 

Gabriel deposited what was left of his sugary supply on the nightstand and slowly removed his clothes, save for his t-shirt and boxers. Before they started any hanky-panky he needed to talk to Sam. He pushed back the covers, stretched lazily, and pushed a pillow beneath his head. Bliss at last! He reached for more chocolate and munched on it. His thoughts strayed and he realized how lucky he was to have escaped Asmodeus. If Ketch hadn’t freed him, and the Winchesters hadn’t taken him in, he would still be rotting away in that prison cell. 

Humans had a saying he liked; God works in mysterious ways, and although he knew his father had no hand in what had happened, the saying touched a deeper truth. He would never have believed he would end up at the bunker, and even stranger, in Sam Winchester’s bed. He had never suspected that the young man felt attracted to him, but then again, he hadn’t been paying attention. Even now that his grace had been fully restored and his blade returned to him, he had a hard time believing any of it was real. Being imprisoned had changed him.

“I don’t like that brooding look on your face,” Sam said as he stepped into his room. He had slung a towel around his hips and used another to dry his hair. “You’re not thinking of vanishing on me, are you?”

“Nope, don’t worry about that. I gave you my word that I’d stay and I’ll keep it.” Gabriel took great pleasure in studying a half naked Sam Winchester. Pity the towel hid the actual prize, but he could do patience, if he wanted. He had to admit that Sam took great care in looking after his body. It showed that he worked out and Gabriel barely stopped himself from hungrily licking his lips. 

Gabriel staring at him in admiration wasn’t lost on Sam, who smirked. “Like what you’re seeing?” He already knew the answer to that question though. Therefore it surprised him that Gabriel wasn’t making a move yet. Seeing Gabriel had opted to wear a shirt, Sam mirrored that action and slipped into a oversized T-shirt. When Gabriel didn’t answer his question, he added, “You can admit it. You’re practically drooling.”

Gabriel took it in stride. “Who wouldn’t drool over a body a like yours?”

Sam slipped between the covers and stretched onto his side, looking at Gabriel. “You once told me that I shouldn’t believe people when they told me that I was just a pretty face,” he remembered.

“Yeah, I love you for your intellect too, Winchester.” Gabriel smiled warmly. “There’s a lot more to you than your good looks. Me, on the other hand, not that much to look at.”

“I’m not complaining,” Sam replied truthfully. “Your eyes are quite something. They got a certain glow to them.”

“My eyes? Sammy!” Gabriel never expected to be complimented on something trivial like that and felt a bit shy. He raised his left hand and rested its palm against Sam’s face. His fingertips slowly moved across his lover’s jaw line, and then slipped into the still wet hair. “I need to ask you something before we take this any further.” And he knew they were headed that way. Maybe not tonight, but shortly. Sam wouldn’t have it any other way. 

“Then ask, if you want an answer.” Sam’s hand sneaked beneath the comforter and settled at the small of the archangel’s back, rubbing the skin there. He would behave – for now.

“Have you ever been with a man before? I’d like to know what to expect when we decide to tango.” His fingertips moved to Sam’s lips, tracing their outline and eventually settling at the nape of his lover’s neck. 

Suddenly Gabriel’s request to slow down made sense to Sam. He was surprised that Gabriel worried about something like that, but at the same time, he hugely admired the archangel for watching out for him. “No, I haven’t. So far, I’ve only been with women.”

“Ah.” Sam had just confirmed his suspicions. “Thanks for being honest and telling me.” It helped him make up his mind. ‘In that case, you can trust me to take good care of you.” He added a wink, hoping to make Sam smile, and it worked.

“I know that.” As they were discussing the matter in a serious way, Sam decided to open up to Gabriel. “I know what to expect and it doesn’t freak me out, it’s just – it’s new. I never did it before.”

“If it helps, I’m nervous too.”

“You are?” Surprised, Sam stared at Gabriel. “Even though you’ve been with another man?”

Gabriel moved closer, slipped into Sam’s offered embrace, and cherished the feel of those arms around him. It was good to feel loved, needed, and wanted. “It’s different each time, Sam, especially when you’re in a serious relationship. Sure, I had some one-nightstands with guys, but this is different. So trust me when I say that I’m nervous too.”

Any hopes Sam might have had of getting laid that night faded at the realization that Gabriel wanted to do this right and to take small steps before going all the way. “You continue to surprise me.”

“Well, that’s me…” Gabriel pulled Sam close and kissed him. Finding out their dynamics in bed would be interesting. Expecting Sam to react in his usually enthusiastic way, Gabriel was proven right. Sam took control of the kiss, demanding more. Gabriel moved along when Sam rolled him onto his back and he liked the feel of the larger man atop of him. 

Sam had a hard time thinking straight now that he was getting to first base. With Gabriel squirming beneath him, his lips momentarily deserted the archangel’s and he quickly removed Gabriel’s shirt. Then he returned to worshipping his lover’s body and his tongue left a moist trail down his shoulder and chest. Gabriel’s musky scent turned him on and he quickly rid himself of his shirt as well. 

Gabriel enjoyed being at Sam’s mercy. His lover’s passion was something to be cherished and savored; he hadn’t encountered such need before. “Go ahead, do what you want with me.” He wanted Sam to be in control. So often, in real life, Sam found himself at the mercy of unworldly powers and Gabriel wanted his lover to have this.

Sam blinked upon hearing that. At that moment, he realized Gabriel would let him get away with anything, no matter what he decided to do, but he didn’t want that. This was as much about respect as it was about love. “You’re safe with me,” he whispered, words which he had also spoken when Gabriel was still recovering from Asmodeus’ abuse.

“I know that,” Gabriel whispered and smiled warmly. He was curious to find out about Sam’s next move. 

Sam returned to worshipping the body beneath him. He kissed, licked, and occasionally left a shallow bite behind, but did nothing to mar his lover’s skin. His right hand settled on the bulge beneath Gabriel’s boxers and he massaged the hard flesh, making his lover squirm beneath him. A part of him felt thrilled at the realization that the archangel was at his mercy, another part urged him to never forget that this was his lover and his trust never to be abused. 

“You’re going to make me come,” Gabriel warned him, unsure of Sam’s intentions. He placed a hand against Sam’s chest and slipped the other around Sam’s neck, bringing him in for another kiss.

“I want you to come,” Sam whispered in-between kisses. “I want to be the one to make you come.” He wanted to know what the archangel looked like the moment he climaxed. Knowing that he was the one to undo Gabriel might even make him come in turn.

“Wicked,” Gabriel whimpered as Sam’s fingers moved beneath the fabric of his briefs, pushing down the material, and wrapping themselves smugly around his erection. “Oh fuck.” Sam’s slow but firm strokes quickly moved him toward the edge, but he didn’t want to leave his lover behind. However, the stimulation was too much. Sam’s tongue fucked his mouth, rough fingers sped up their strokes, pumping him faster, and eventually pushing him over the edge. He came hard, biting his lower lip and trying hard not to call out Sam’s name.

“Fuck yes.” Sam whispered in a low, husky voice. “Come for me.” He rubbed his erection against Gabriel’s thigh and that was all it took. He grunted as he climaxed and dropped like a dead weight onto Gabriel, pressing him deeper into the mattress. Panting hard, he tried to regain control over his senses, but his body still hummed with pleasure. And that was just because of a hand job! What would making love be like? 

Gabriel closed his eyes in bliss and relished finding release. All the tension that had built during the past few days finally left his body and a deep sense of satisfaction washed over him. He turned his head to check if he had left Sam behind and felt reassured, finding Sam had come as well. “Thank you for that,” he whispered in an unguarded and loving tone. He pressed a kiss onto Sam’s brow and wrapped his arms around his lover.

Gabriel’s words touched something deep inside Sam, who hadn’t believed Gabriel would let him take control like that, let alone thank him. “You’re welcome. I enjoyed that too.” Sam chuckled. “You were right to go slow. This was mind blowing. I might not survive actually making love to you.” His heart still raced and beating way too fast. He was still experiencing a sensual high and by the looks of it, Gabriel was feeling it too

Gabriel closed his eyes, buried his face against Sam’s shoulder, and sighed deeply. “That was good,” he purred.

“Yeah, it was.” Sam slid away from his lover, moved onto his back, and pulled the archangel close again. After establishing a firm hold on Gabriel, he pulled up the comforter and covered them with it. He would cherish this experience for the rest of his life, no matter how long or short that might turn out to be. 

TBC

 

Part 9

“Dean, you need to see this.” Cas gestured for Dean to follow him. 

Dean, who had only just woken up, looked rumpled and gave Cas a bewildered look. “What are you talking about?”

“Gabriel reached Azrael and she reacted. Now hurry.”

Cas dashed out of the room and the angel’s speed made Dean blink. “Give me a moment to wake up!” Coffee, damn it, he needed coffee!

“You are already awake, stop stalling,” came Cas’ reply from down the corridor.

Dean shook his head, ran a hand over his face, and sat upright. He loved Cas, he really did, but sometimes…

…

Ten minutes later, fully dressed and mostly awake, Dean joined Cas in the kitchen. Upon seeing Cas had started the coffee maker, he sighed blissfully and mouthed a thank you. “So what happened?”

Cas pointed at the white envelope on the kitchen table. “That happened.”

Dean poured himself some coffee, grateful that Cas had made it just the way he liked it: strong! After sipping repeatedly, he started to feel more like himself and headed for the kitchen table. “What does it say?” Why hadn’t Cas opened it yet?

“I can’t take hold of it. It’s warded.”

Dean’s eyebrow inched higher. He reached for the envelope himself, but encountered some sort of invisible barrier, making it impossible for him to grab it. On the front of the envelope, written in black, calligraphic-like letters was written Gabriel’s name. “We need to fetch him.”

“I’m on my way. You drink your coffee. You’re no use to me like that.”

Dean rolled back his eyes and shook his head repeatedly. Oh, the joys of dating an angel, or to be more precise, Castiel!

…

“Gabriel, you need to join us in the kitchen – now,” Cas said in a demanding tone while loudly knocking on the door. “Don’t pretend you’re asleep. I know you’re not.”

Sam, who had been soundly asleep until that very moment, startled awake. “What…?” Finding his arms empty, he immediately scanned the room for Gabriel. The archangel sat in the chair next to the bed, fully dressed, very much awake and munching on a chocolate bar left over from the kitchen raid last night. 

“It’s Cas,” Gabriel supplied. “He’s not a morning person, is he?”

“That’s quite the understatement!” Sam suddenly recalled what had happened between them last night and blushed. Turning onto his side, he cocked his head and studied Gabriel.

“Yes, it really happened,” Gabriel replied, amused. “However, you should get dressed so we can join grumpy in the kitchen.”

Sam sat up, placed his feet on the floor, and wished he didn’t feel that nervous. But last night had been really important to him. For the first time in his life, he had a partner who might be able survive the things life threw at him. 

“Or do you want me to take care of that? I’d be quicker and Cas is getting impatient.”

Sam gave Gabriel a confused look. What was the archangel talking about? He found out a moment later after Gabriel had snapped his fingers. Suddenly he was dressed and he felt like he had taken a very long and hot shower. 

“Better?” Gabriel hoped he wasn’t taking any liberties with Sam. 

“It’s okay,” Sam said and got to his feet. Well, maybe he shouldn’t question this. Not so long ago he had told Gabriel not to over think matters. “Let’s join Cas. Hopefully there’s coffee.”

“If not, I can supply it,” Gabriel offered as he advanced on his lover. “Sleep well?” Bemused, he noticed that Sam’s blush deepened. Sam was no prude, he knew that, so why was the younger man reacting in that manner?

“Still getting used to… us… being together,” Sam explained awkwardly. It was probably a good thing that they hadn’t gone all the way last night. Gabriel had been right about taking this slow. He hadn’t thought it possible, but he did need time to get used to their changed relationship. Gabriel didn’t react verbally, instead the archangel took his hand and reassuringly stroked his fingers. The affectionate gesture thankfully lessened Sam’s nervousness. “Let’s do this.”

Gabriel opened the door and grinned smugly at Cas, who was giving them an impatient look. “Lead on,” he told Cas in a teasing tone. Cas turned and marched out of the corridor, clearly annoyed by Gabriel’s antics.

For some reason Gabriel continued to hold his hand and Sam welcomed the touch, at times stealing a look at his lover. “Do you know what this is about?”

“If I’m not mistaken, dear sis sent me message and Cas found it. Knowing her, she warded it and it vexes Cas that he can’t read it. I told you, she’s peculiar.”

“And she knows where to find you.”

“Sam, last night I lit up in the night’s sky like a damn beacon! Of course she knows.” 

Gabriel released his hand upon entering the kitchen and the archangel headed for the coffee maker. Sam watched him put several spoonfuls of sugar into his mug and then sip it. Sam shuddered and opted to drink his coffee black. 

“Eat,” Dean decreed and placed a plate with bacon and eggs in front of Sam, knowing full well it would earn him a lecture on fat clogging up his arteries, but to his surprise, his brother –the health freak – promptly dug into it. “You got mail,” he told Gabriel and pointed at the envelope. 

Gabriel had noticed the envelope as well and took hold of it, while giving Cas a smug look. “Let’s see what sister dearest has to say.” He opened the envelope and unfolded the paper. 

“What does it say?” Cas moved closer, eagerly trying to read the writing.

Gabriel had mercy on Cas and read aloud, “In the moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump, we will be changed. Dear brother, I’m still guarding the city of the dead. You know where to find me.”

“1 Corinthians 15:52,” Cas said, beating Sam to the citation. 

“Yeah, that,” Sam whispered; he had known that.

“Do you know where to find her?” Dean didn’t care what part of the bible it was from. He just wanted to take action. 

“I do.” Gabriel vanished the letter and looked at them. “Do you want to go now or –“

“Now,” Dean said decisively. “We’re wasting precious time.”

Gabriel nodded and focused on Sam. “You’re going to love this,” he mused.

Sam blinked. “Love what?”

“You’ll love her,” Gabriel quipped, “Azrael is your kind of angel.”

Sam wanted to question Gabriel about that puzzling comment, but his surroundings changed, and all of a sudden, they weren’t at the bunker anymore. “Where are we?” Sam looked about, finding Dean and Cas looking equally mystified. 

“What does it look like?” Gabriel questioned and leaned against a tomb covered in ivy and battered down by the elements. 

Sam looked about. It was morning; dawn to be exact and they were on a hill overlooking a major city. “Where are we?” he repeated, shuddering as he found himself surrounded by graves, tombs, and memorials. Then he recalled the message. “The city of the dead?” Graveyards were a bad thing in their book. All kind of monsters hang out there.

Dean shared Sam’s sentiment. He didn’t like being there either. A place like that always harbored ghouls, vampires, and other monsters. “I don’t like this.” The only good thing was that it was morning and the sun was rising. He wouldn’t have liked being here in the dead of night, not without any of his weapons close at hand.

“This, my friends, is the Necropolis. We’re in Glasgow, Scotland,” Gabriel announced with a Scottish accent. My, this brought back memories. He hadn’t been in Scotland for a long time.

The accent sounded fake to Dean, but Sam, recalling the story about Martin, wasn’t sure it was. Maybe it was a bit of Martin’s echo coming through. “I guess it’s an appropriate place to house the angel of death.” 

“You don’t have to worry about monsters.” Gabriel turned toward Dean, who nervously shuffled his feet. He had caught whispers of Dean’s thoughts earlier. “Don’t you feel it?” He gave the older Winchester a hopeful look before moving on to Cas. “You should be able to tell the difference.”

Cas nodded. “Something is different, you’re right about that.” The place felt peaceful, quiet… shielded in a way. “What is this?” he asked in bewilderment.

“This Necropolis has a guardian,” Gabriel informed them as he walked toward a memorial standing to their right. “See that angel?” He wasn’t surprised to see Sam move forward first and circle the memorial. 

Sam raised his head and studied the angel overseeing the city. It was clearly a male angel. The dark, stone statue looked worn as weather conditions had damaged it. The angel possessed a tranquil expression and in his hands rested a white lily. Something he had read the other day popped up. “That lily...”

“Symbolizes purity and truth.” Dean supplied, recalling coming across the same thing in those ancient books. Was it another message since it had shown up in the portraits of the archangel Gabriel?

“Good thinking!” Gabriel watched them closely. “So what do you think we should do next?” Maybe he was enjoying this a little bit too much, but knowing Azrael the way he did, she’d opt for a grand entrance. She had always tended to be a bit theatrical and it was probably why he liked her so much.

Dean sighed impatiently. “Gabriel, we need to hurry if we want to keep heaven open for business! We don’t have time for this!” At times, Gabriel could be extremely frustrating and the trickster of old seemed to have returned.

Giving in because Dean had made a valid point, Gabriel walked toward the memorial and circled it, while saying: “In the moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump, we will be changed.” He was really looking forward to Sam meeting Azrael; that encounter promised to be very interesting indeed.

Dean frowned; he should have known it would be something like that. Unexpectedly the air began to vibrate and buzzed loudly, much like when Gabriel had sent out that call. Then their surroundings changed. The sunlight dimmed, dark clouds formed overhead, and the skies darkened. “Is this supposed to happen?” Growing worried, Dean wished he had brought some weapons along. He felt strangely vulnerable as he didn’t know what to expect. Cas must have picked up on that, as the angel moved closer and took on a protective stance. Dean immediately made eye contact, wondering if Cas knew what to expect, but his lover seemed equally baffled.

A large, ominous shadow formed above the memorial and it took Sam a moment to identify the shape forming above his head. Wings – large angel’s wings. Instinctively he moved closer to Gabriel, but the archangel seemed unconcerned. He was even smiling. “Gabe?”

“It’ll be fine, Sam. Don’t worry. She always liked a bit of drama.” The two of them had often frustrated the other angels with their antics. Lucifer had enjoyed some of their messing about, but Michael had often been infuriated. It was just another reason why he had opted to leave heaven after she had chosen earth as her home.

What Sam had assumed were merely shadows, turned out to be the real thing. Real wings, made up of black, cobalt blue and silver feathers, created a downwind as they moved, producing the odd swooshing sound that washed over them. Long, black hair framed a surprisingly young face and her silver-colored eyes looked upon him with amusement. Sam fought the urge to lower his gaze, feeling something he couldn’t label, but he was too fascinated by her appearance to do so. She wore an old-fashioned black dress and draped across her shoulders was a black cloak into which silver threading had been woven. He swallowed hard. This was what he had always envisioned an angel to look like; with real wings and a majestic appearance.

Allowing Sam his moment, Gabriel addressed Dean and Cas instead. “Bit of a show off, if you ask me.” The look Cas shot him was hard to read, as always. “She was always way too fond of the way mortals envisioned us, angels. Hence the wings-thing.”

Dean felt at a loss. “That’s her?” His mother had always told him that angels were watching over him, and back then, before he had realized most angels were dicks, he had envisioned them looking like this. Something in her appearance and expression touched his very soul. Gabriel had referred to her as the mother of angels, maybe there was truth in that. She felt ancient and in a strange way even familiar.

Azrael sought out Gabriel’s gaze first. “It is good to see you, brother.” The last time they had met was two centuries ago. Although two hundred years were nothing more but a blink of an eye to her, she had missed him. Gabriel had been her favorite out of the four archangels. Like her, he had always felt connected to earth and the mortals who dwelt there. Heaven had never been their chosen home.

“Dear sister! It’s a joy to behold your eternal radiance!” Gabriel curtsied dramatically. “You haven’t changed a bit!” She liked a bit of the theatrics, just like him. Another factor that had made them gravitate toward each other in heaven.

“I cannot say the same thing of you,” she returned his teasing. “Your face might still be Martin’s, but your essence has changed, brother. You are much different. I approve,” she added and graced him with a beatific smile, knowing he would understand. 

Next, her gaze settled on Castiel. “You do not remember me. None of my children do, but I remember you, Castiel, my son. It is good to see you again.”

Taken aback, Cas wavered. Rationally, he knew who and what she was. but he didn’t think of her as his mother. “Gabriel told me you created me.”

“I did and I took great pride in doing so. Even back then I knew you were destined for greatness. However, I regret it came with such painful trials.” Her facial expression changed and she raised her hand as if to touch Castiel, but then reconsidered. Castiel acted distant and she didn’t want to force her touch upon him. 

Sam noticed that her feet didn’t actually touch the earth; she was afloat in the air. Seeking out his lover’s support, he whispered, “Gabriel, I –“ But the words refused to come to him. Her presence overwhelmed him.

“I told you that you’d love her. She’s your kind of angel.” Gabriel watched Sam trying to regain his composure. He had tried to warn the young man. Addressing Azrael once more he said, “You’re still into living up to human expectation of us?” He gestured dramatically and pointed at her wings. Back in heaven, she had annoyed the hell out of Raphael by giving herself wings and flaunting them in front of his brother. Raphael hadn’t reacted with kindness, belittling her for choosing that form. She had ignored him though.

“I do like their representation of us and I am fond of my wings, brother. Much like you took pleasure in being the trickster. You have been busy.” Although their reactions amused her, she wanted to move this along. They had a reason for seeking her out.

Dean was working up the courage to address her and tell her they needed her to cooperate and create more angels, but for some elusive reason he felt too awed to do so. Maybe he should let Gabriel do the talking this time. He just hoped the archangel wasn’t going to screw up. They had worked long and hard to get to this point and the stakes were high. Heaven had to remain in business!

Azrael’s gaze moved away from Cas and settled on Dean, easily picking up on his unease. “Do not fear me, child. You may not remember me, but we met before -- each time you died. Those memories however were taken away from you.” 

“Yeah, I died a couple of times,” was all Dean managed. “I don’t remember you.” He was certain he would, considering the impact she was having on him. For some odd reason his fingers itched, wanting to touch those wings and find out if those feathers were for real. He controlled the urge though, not wanting to make a fool out of himself.

“I know you do not, child.” Regretting Dean felt too overwhelmed to talk to her in an uninhibited way, she moved onto Sam and smiled at him. Unfortunately, he looked stunned too and she didn’t know how to make them feel more comfortable. “Sam Winchester, I want to thank you. You captured my brother’s heart. It was empty for a very long time, thank you for giving him purpose again.”

Sam swallowed convulsively, his nervousness making it hard for him to think rationally. Gabriel could have warned him more specifically! In the end, he managed a nod and a soft, “Thank you,” in return. He didn’t trust his voice though and stayed quiet. He wasn’t going to make a fool out of himself in front of her.

Gabriel stepped in and took back control of the conversation. “Az, we’re here to ask you for a favor, but I’m guessing you already know that.” Gabriel took Sam’s hand in an attempt to ground him. He had known Azrael would affect them, but hadn’t expected for it to happen to such a degree. Even Cas seemed intimidated – although, Cas was impossible to read so he might be mistaken.

“You are referring to the chaos currently ruling heaven.” Azrael had made inquires after Gabriel’s message had reached her. “They managed to decimate their numbers and only a small group of angels remained behind. You require me to create new ones or to resurrect some.” She had given the request ample thought before contacting Gabriel and had reached a decision. 

“Exactly!” Gabriel caught the pondering look in her eyes and wondered about it. “How do you feel about that?”

“I shall right things in heaven. The souls of the departed are precious to me and will be taken care of. Maybe I shall reside in heaven until they organized themselves. I refuse to stay permanently though.” She looked out over the Necropolis and melancholy appeared in her eyes. This was her home. This was where she chose to dwell.

Dean, who had listened closely, breathed a sigh of relief. That was one thing less to worry about. It was great that for once their plan had actually worked. “Thank you,” he managed in a shaky voice. Her gaze settled back on him and she smiled, making him feel shy in an odd way.

Azrael turned her attention back to the archangel standing next to her. She had wanted to see for herself that his grace had been restored and that he had fully healed. It was good to know that her brother had recovered from his recent ordeal. Had she known Asmodeus had gotten his dirty hands on him, she would have intervened, but her attention had been elsewhere. She had been remiss and wanted to make amends. “Gabriel, a word of warning. Michael will find a way into this world and must be stopped.” 

“Glad to know you agree with us,” Gabriel replied, knowing she was about to help them dealing with that threat as well. “Can you help? We would appreciate it.”

“Use Lucifer’s grace to open a portal and keep it open. Should you need me, call upon me and I will be there. You have my support. I will not let anyone destroy my home.” She lovingly took in her surroundings – her home. “No one shall destroy this,” she repeated, making them a promise. 

Visitors had appeared at the memorial and she smiled sadly. “Now excuse me, as I am needed elsewhere. And Gabriel, do be careful. I would hate for you to be hurt again, brother.” Her form briefly shimmered in the dark and then sunlight reappeared, enveloping them in warm beams. 

Dean felt relieved at realizing she had returned them to their world. He remained quiet, still trying to compose himself. What had happened just now had somehow profoundly affected him, though he had no idea why. His gaze drifted back to the memorial and he found two young girls, maybe eight or nine, walking around it and reciting the verse. They were dressed identically, indicating they might be twins. “Why are they doing that?” The question escaped him. 

“They know she’ll answer them.” Gabriel knew Azrael would never ignore mourners. She always answered their calls. He walked up to Dean and cautiously rested a hand on his shoulder, unsure his touch was welcome. “Not all angels are dicks,” he stated in a tone between teasing and sincerity. 

Dean had a hard time believing his eyes when Azrael manifested again, although this time, in a less intimidating fashion. She took the girls’ hands in hers and lead them down the hill, listening to them and occasionally addressing them, all the time radiating a sense of peace which was clear for all to see.

“What is she doing?” Sam joined them and stared at the small group moving away from them.

“Those girls lost their mother a month ago,” Cas explained in a rough voice. “She’s taking them to visit her grave and offering them some comfort.”

“But… those girls, they’re talking to her!” Sam blinked. “They know she’s there! They can see her!” 

“She is the angel of death and mercy, Sammy. Part of her job is to council the ones left behind, those who are grieving. She has always taken that part of her job description very seriously. Mourners who come here are instinctively drawn to the statue. If asked, they might be unable to explain why, but for some reason, they circle the memorial and speak the words engraved in the stone. The secret is passed on from generation to generation, once people find out about her.” Gabriel realized their visit had had a huge impact on his companions. “It’s time to go home,” he told them in a surprisingly gentle tone and snapped his fingers, taking them back to the bunker.

TBC

 

 

 

 

Part 10

Dean was in desperate need of beer and uncapped a bottle. Once the cool liquid slid down his throat, he started to feel himself again. Sitting down at the kitchen table, he looked at his companions. Cas and Sam seemed equally thoughtful, only Gabriel was back to munching on some pie. Hold on, pie? His pie? Oh, what the heck, let him have it. He had his beer. “What the hell did we just witness?” he whispered.

“Azrael,” Gabriel replied affectionately. “I told you she was peculiar.”

“Do you think she meant it? That she’ll reorganize heaven?” Cas gave Gabriel a pensive look. Meeting her had affected him as well, although he didn’t know yet in what way.

“She keeps her promises. She’ll sort out the mess upstarts.” Gabriel raised a hand and pointed to the ceiling. “And they’ll listen to her. She’ll put a stop to whatever is going on up there.”

Sam had had time to think everything over, but was still left with some questions. “Gabe, I understand she put on a show for us, probably hoping to intimidate –“ Sam stopped short because Gabriel was shaking his head.

“Not in order to intimidate you,” Gabriel explained. “She isn’t like that. Sure, she’s a bit of a drama queen, but she isn’t into intimidation. A lot of angels made fun of her back in heaven because she would visit earth regularly, appearing to humans in that guise. Michael often lectured her on giving into the mortals’ expectation of us. He loved being worshipped, and I reckon it annoyed the hell out of him that she was getting the response he wanted for himself. But he refused to play the game and sulked instead.”

“The thing I don’t get,” Dean mused as he emptied his bottle, “is why she shows herself to people; like those girls.”

“As I said, she’s different. She chose her exile on earth because she prefers humans to angels.” Gabriel shrugged. What was there to get?

“Much like you,” Cas suddenly interjected. “You left heaven for earth too.”

“I never fit in, Cas, you should know that. So I chose earth over heaven too. After she left, the manipulation and fighting back home worsened. So I cut myself loose.” Gabriel felt it was getting too personal for his taste and thus time to change the subject. “So, otherworld Michael. What are we going to do about him?”

“We’re gonna track down Lucifer, capture him, and use his grace to open up a portal.” Dean had already thought this through.

“And how are you going to find him? I doubt he’ll write me a love letter should I try to contact him. As far as my dearest brother is concerned, he killed me, remember?”

“We’ll find a way. Rowena managed to track you down, so maybe the spell will work on Lucifer too.” Yes, the more he thought about it, the better Dean liked it. “I’ll give her call and ask her to join us at the bunker.”

“Swell, so we’re going after Lucy!” Gabriel was glad he was back in possession of his archangel blade; it might come in handy when dealing with Lucifer.

…

Sam excused himself and went to his room. So much crazy stuff had happened lately and he needed a moment to work through everything. Gabriel had given him a worried look, but Sam had smiled reassuringly at his lover. They were good.

He sat down on the bed and drew in a deep breath. Meeting Azrael had been a dream come true, one he had never realized he actually harbored. At the same time, the encounter had made him realize just who he was actually dating; an archangel. 

“Hey, can I come inside or do you prefer to be left alone?” 

Sam smiled at hearing Gabriel’s voice coming from the corridor. The door was still closed, and Gabriel was keeping his distance, respecting his need for privacy. “You can come in.” 

Gabriel slowly opened the door and peeked inside. “I just want to make sure you’re okay. The way you left worried me.”

“Come here.” Sam gestured for Gabriel to walk over to him and patted the mattress next to him. “I want you here. Everything’s fine. Sit down, will you?” He didn’t like the hesitant expression on Gabriel’s face. He didn’t want his lover to think he wasn’t wanted.

Gabriel however had different ideas. Instead of sitting down on the bed, he slid onto Sam’s lap, straddling the taller man. “Do you mind?” He cocked his head and searched Sam’s expression. 

Sam chuckled. “No, I don’t.” He brought his arms up behind Gabriel’s back and embraced his lover. “Everything just hit me, you know?”

“Maybe I should have given you a more explicit warning. But I didn’t think she would overwhelm you the way she did.” Gabriel buried his fingers in Sam’s hair and caressed those dark strands. 

“I always had a thing for angels, according to Dean, that is.” Sam opened up, reminding himself that this was his lover – his partner. “I was the first to accept that Cas had pulled Dean from hell. It confirmed my beliefs; angels were good. They watch over us, help us. Than Uriel, Gadreel, Zachariah and countless other angels happened and I realized they weren’t the guardian angels I had always believed in. Then you come along and in the end, you pulled through. You helped me when I needed you. And now, Azrael is going to help us too. It upended my world again.”

“Wow, pretty deep stuff,” Gabriel teased. “Sounds like a lot to deal with.”

“It is,” Sam confirmed. “But in a good way.” Gabriel shifted, making Sam very much aware of the situation they were in. “I love you,” he whispered and sucked in his breath, only now fully realizing the words he had just said.

“I love you too, Sam,” Gabriel said, returning the confession. “You upended my world too – in a good way,” he added quickly. He had turned rather maudlin since accepting Sam as his lover. Maybe it was time to stop talking and to make love instead? His hand moved to cradle the back of Sam’s neck and he instigated a kiss. 

Sam reacted at once. He wanted this so badly. Crushing Gabriel against him, he deepened the kiss and took control. His hands moved beneath Gabriel’s shirt and stroked his lover’s back, before dipping lower to slide beneath the waistband and squeeze Gabriel’s ass. “I want you.”

That didn’t surprise Gabriel. “I’ve made you wait long enough, haven’t I?” Gabriel helped Sam to remove his leather jacket and shirt the old-fashioned way. Not wasting any time, Sam’s tongue lapped at his throat, only to move slowly toward his nipples. Gabriel threw back his head in surrender, offering more skin to his lover. Sam’s large hands roamed his upper body, caressing, teasing and even scratching lightly, drawing mews from his lips. Seeing Sam hungrily lick his lips went straight to his cock, which promptly rose to attention.

Sam sobered long enough to realize Gabriel wasn’t going to stop him this time. “How do you want to do this?”

“Make love to me, Sam. And rest assured, I do love a good pounding. I can take everything you deal out.”

But that wasn’t the way Sam wanted things to be – not exactly. “I’ll take care of you, I promise.” He managed to undo Gabriel’s zipper and pushed down the slacks. “No underwear?” he said teasingly, but enjoying the easy access. 

“Too constrictive,” Gabriel breathed the words into Sam’s ear. “And I thought you’d appreciate it.” He wiggled an eyebrow and threw back his head because Sam had taken to nibbling along his throat.

Sam sensed Gabriel’s surrender and promised not to take advantage of the trust the archangel was showing him. “Can you do away with my clothes?” His request caused Gabriel to laugh and a snap of his fingers later, Sam found himself naked, hard, and ready. “Thanks. Your powers do come in handy.”

“Glad I could help.” Gabriel greedily took in his lover’s body. “All mine,” he whispered with pride. “All mine…”

Sam chuckled. Any doubts he might have had about them getting together vanished. He ran his thumb down Gabriel’s spine and showered his lover’s chest with kisses. Gabriel unexpectedly shifted, raised himself, and before Sam was aware of what was happening, his lover positioned himself above his erection. Maddeningly slowly, Gabriel lowered himself, taking in inch by inch. Sam’s eyes widened in surprise, but then he quickly supported his lover, who once more occupied his lap. “You…” Gabriel’s action left him speechless.

Gabriel felt smug and it showed. He had surprised Sam, who looked stunned. “You feel good,” he whispered into Sam’s ear, only to suck at the earlobe and raise himself again. Sam’s groan traveled straight to his cock in turn and Gabriel tried to find a rhythm that would work for them. 

Finally regaining his senses, Sam wrapped an arm around his lover, held him tight, and rolled them onto the bed, effectively pinning Gabriel beneath him. Gabriel squirmed briefly, trying to make himself more comfortable, and pulled Sam close so he could easily kiss him. 

Sam supported Gabriel’s legs and buried himself to the hilt inside the warm and welcoming body. Rational thought deserted him, and all he could think about was giving them release. He pulled out all the way, only to claim his lover with the next thrust.

Gabriel wrapped his fingers around his cock and paced his strokes with Sam’s thrusts. The passion, the need, that showed in Sam’s frantic lovemaking was something he had never experienced before and made him come quickly. Too quickly perhaps, but there would be other times when they could make their lovemaking last. 

Gabriel tensed beneath him and Sam committed the way the archangel looked at the moment of his release to memory; unguarded, passionately, and eagerly accepting everything Sam had to give. Sam followed only moments later, finding release as well and claiming Gabriel’s lips once more. His movements stilled, his flushed body trembled, and he finally released all that pent up energy. 

Gabriel quickly opened his arms, caught Sam in them, and pulled his lover close. Sam panted hard and quivered. Burying him in a tight hug, Gabriel kissed Sam slowly, tenderly, trying to temper all that passion. 

It took Sam some time to calm down. He had made love before, to several women in fact, and he had loved each one of them, but this… This had been something completely different. “Gabriel,” he managed, realizing he was once more crushing the smaller man beneath him. 

“Stay, don’t move,” Gabriel decreed and held him close. “I’m sturdier than I look, being an archangel, you know,” he said teasingly. “You can’t hurt me even if you wanted to; self-regenerating powers, remember?” Sam nodded tiredly and the smile on the Winchester’s face was something Gabriel would never forget, especially considering the fact that he had put it there. “We’re good together, don’t you think?”

Sam rolled onto his side and settled down after pulling Gabriel into his arms again. “I have no words to describe…”

Gabriel felt smug. “They say first times are awkward and it gets better the more you practice.” As he had hoped, Sam chuckled. “I can do with more practice.”

“But not quite yet, I’m afraid. You wore me down.”

“We have to work on your stamina!” Gabriel rested his head against Sam’s shoulder and idly stroked his lover’s face. “Sam, are you really, absolutely sure about this? Do you want this?” 

Sam briefly wondered about the insecure ring to Gabriel’s voice, but then dismissed it. Maybe Gabriel just needed to hear it again. “Yes, I’m sure, and yes, I want this. My eyes are wide open walking into this.”

“Good, just making sure.” Gabriel closed his eyes and savored having Sam close. He didn’t know what tomorrow would bring, but he always had today and he would do his best to never let Sam Winchester down.

The end


End file.
